I started school before I was 5 years old, in 1975. I can't recall my first day but know it was unpleasant. I know because virtually every other day was a terrible experience and I hated it. I'd found myself in an environment that was the complete antithesis of what my home life had been to date; It was brutally and often painfully judgmental and lacked any similarity to the world I knew.
I learned very quickly how malicious, spiteful and abusive people could be towards each other and gained a lot of wisdom at the same time.
I grew up in a small town, son of a mixed-race marriage, the first of its kind in the town, and was glaringly different from everyone else at school.
I was called many things, none of which I'll write here because you have imaginations...I was none of those things of course, but that didn't stop the other kids from calling me those names, excluding me from every opportunity for social interaction and beating on me because I was different.
I was shunned for being different, had no friends at school and hated every moment I was there. It taught me many things about myself, life and people, about fortitude, perseverance, self-esteem, fear, loathing, forgiveness, hate...How to absorb emotional and physical pain, and how to hand out the same.
As my school years moved on I became more tolerated, or maybe it all just affected me less. However, I can't recall many moments in which I was made to feel an accepted, valued and equal member of the school. It was quite painful at the time, but I pushed on.
High school changed things somewhat; Society had changed to some degree. The mid-late 1970's saw an influx of Vietnamese people from the war and the haters had fresh targets to assault. By 1985 Australia had become significantly more multicultural and some of the issues went away, or went underground. As I grew bigger and stronger I began to take a little affirmative action of my own too, actions which sent quite clear messages at the time.
All of those years and those incidents of racial vilification, cruel pranks, punches, kicks, shoves, name-calling and myriad of other acts of cruelty became like armour to me. Through necessity I turned it into a positive; I became a stronger person. I became resilient and found the ability to endure. Sure it was a very terrible time for me but it didn't kill me, it made me stronger, emotionally and mentally.
It also set me up for the harsh reality that is the world in which we live; A world full of bullies, trolls and insecure people who seek to find some vestige of self-esteem through the denigration of others; Which never really works.
I don't know if I'd change the past even if I could; It is, after all, the major contributing factor to who I am right now. I guess the 5-14 year-old me might digress however life has coalesced to create the person I am now; It's often the bad things, hard times, failures and harsh lessons that help us grow and develop, isn't it.
What I would change is some of the ways in which I have responded to a few of those incidents; I handed out some hard-lessons of my own at times and as an adult I wish I could change that, some of them at least.
The funny thing is that being different isn't just about being mocha-coloured in a white world like I was.
Being tall, fat, thin or short is different too. Having red hair, curly, straight or none, is as well. Living here instead of there, being rich, poor, or speaking a particular language is different. Not being good at sports, being good at sports, liking Donald Trump, eating ants, drinking beer, being vegan or wearing glasses is different. Do you get my point? We're all different, but all the same. Human. Is it naive of me to think the world would be better if we all remembered that?
Growing up different can be hard on a kid; For me it was, but it was also a very important and valuable part of my life and I am better for it. Can I be hard, or harsh, now because of it? Yes, certainly; But mostly I take away the positives, understand that I have gained great wisdom through adversity and learned much about myself as a man, a human and a member of Earths'community.
I like who I am, the patience I display, understanding that no one is perfect and also my ability to crush those who seek to harm women, children, the weak, elderly, disabled and infirm. As adults we all need to make choices based around what we know, understand or surmise; I feel I make reasonable decisions and all due to the process that began back when I first hit school.
Thanks for reading y'all...Now get out there and embrace your differentness. (Not a word probably, but I don't care...I'm different.)
This post was inspired by a conversation I had with a friend whose early-teenage daughter has recently been vilified, and assaulted, in a similar way I was myself. The parent, a military guy, called me for a chat and has decided on a different course of action to what he'd first decided. I am pleased I was able to make his see some reason.
Tomorrow isn't promised - Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default
An original post written by a human
Discord: galenkp#9209 🇦🇺
Image taken by me at Gardens by the Bay, Singapore.
Everyone has something that makes them different, because we can't all be the same. Some try to hide their differences, yet others have no choice, but to wear them for all to see. How much of the teasing and bullying from others is their own way to try and make themselves feel better over their own insecurities, I wonder? If they can find just one thing in someone else that makes them different, then maybe they can use that as the distraction to everyone else so they don't notice their own differences.
I believe much of what bullies do, the logic or motivation behind it, comes from insecurity of some sort. It comes out as bullying as a way to deflect it. In that I agree with you completely. I do not think it's ok to do so, no matter what the insecurity. I've always found the best way to increase one's feeling of self-worth or value is to increase someone else's. Works every time.
!ENGAGE 20
It's chicken logic! By that I mean it's a basic level animal instinct.
"I've always found the best way to increase one's feeling of self-worth or value is to increase someone else's"
If only we could teach all children that. You are so right! How amazing is an environment where everyone is lifting each other up. It really does make everyone feel like they are worthwhile.
The world would be a different, and better place if we all worked on the increase someone else's self-esteem premise. Still imperfect, but better.
Thanks for commenting. How good is this cooler weather, and a little rain huh? You getting any?
It's been great. I've barely had to water, even though we haven't had rain since the downpour a couple of weeks ago. It's felt more humid too, but cool enough to be bearable. How's that beautiful garden of yours looking?
We spent some time int he garden over the weekend...And when I say we, I mean Faith. I did some heavy lifting though. It's coming on nicely. We had a downpour this morning which freshened things up and considering I don't like the extreme heat this temperature is very agreeable. I don't think it will last though with some hot weather on the way. Oh well, love it whilst we can huh?
Oh no, another round next week, I see! Better get back into that watering schedule.
Does Faith enjoy gardening? Must have been nice to get out there over the weekend.
@minismallholding you have received
20 ENGAGEfrom @galenkp!View and trade the tokens on Steem Engine.
Yep we are all different and very glad for it, Imagine a world full of people the same as me😱 how boring would that get🤣
Posted using Partiko Android
You don't reckon the world deserves a mini me of you? Come on mate, surely there's room in the world for that! 😂
Yes that might be okay but not everyone else being me🤪
Posted using Partiko Android
Yeah, good point...It might get boring if everyone was you.
😍Beautiful ........ I like to plant flowers in my yard, it feels like after waking up in the morning I was in the flower garden.❤
Thank for sharing My friend
The picture? Yes thanks. But what did you think of the post itself? I'm curious.
Being a victim of bullying is a truly terrible thing, no matter what your age. The bullied effect can sometimes leave traumatic years later. I realize that, very regrettable.
Today's diary has helped you record your experiences, and express your feelings.
thank you for sharing experiences
It can be a good opportunity to learn though, as I did, however it can be hurtful too I guess. It can make or break a person.
I agree with you.
learning from experience is the greatest lesson in living in the future there is no more bullying
Kids can be c*nts. Plain and simple. Oz sounds a little like Scotland back then. Racist as feck. Fortunately, things are so much better now. I wouldn't even regret dishing out the hard lessons. I dished out some too :OD
Yeah, you're right about kids. I think that's the same all over too.
Australia used to be a very racist place but it's changed dramatically over the years. It's now a very multicultural place and there's a lot of tolerance. Bullies still exist though if course.
It's funny, my wife is as white as white can be and even she got teased and picked on at school, for being taller than everyone else. Kids huh?
Oh, those lessons I dished out...Some were pretty harsh, but then sometimes an example needs to be made right? Seems like you have made a few in your day. ✅
Thanks for commenting, as always.
I got teased for having white/blonde hair. It's nuts. A lesson isn't a lesson of it isn't dealt out properly :0D
It's crazy huh? A joke is one thing, but cruelty is quite another...Kids are expert at the latter. Still, it made us who we are right?
It's totally as you say, we wouldn't be the same without it
Hello!
This post has been manually curated, resteemed
and gifted with some virtually delicious cake
from the @helpiecake curation team!
Much love to you from all of us at @helpie!
Keep up the great work!
Manually curated by @priyanarc.
@helpie is a Community Witness.
I once saw a picture that was just a line of skulls with descriptors below them like white, black, etc. They all looked the same. It was to show that, even with differences, all people are still people and deep down are the same.
Yes, I agree...It's interesting how people choose to isolate a particular thing and turn it agains another person. Humans are smart, but also incredibly stupid creatures. I shudder to think what those kids at school would have done to me if they knew I was from another planet entirely! Lol.
Howdy sir galenkp! In this case the saying "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" is accurate! People are even mean to someone who likes to eat ants?
The ant comment was a little imagery to indicate that it doesn't matter what someone does, who they are, what they look like, sound like, walk like, where they went to school, or didn't, what they eat or drink...No matter what, someone else can find something to pick on and bully them for...Yes, even people who eat ants bugs. See link below.
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2018/feb/08/ants-in-your-pans-can-i-get-the-bug-for-eating-insects
Ok I agree. I read the article in that link, very interesting! lol. The only way ants sound palatable is if they're covered in chocolate!
I'd still not eat ants...I mean why would someone eat ants when there's so many other tasty things to eat? It doesn't make a lot of sense to me, unless I was starving...But eating them for no reason other to be eating them?
lol..it makes no sense to me either unless they're trying to say we should eat insects instead of participating in the evil beef industry. lol. That would take alot of ants!
Hmm...Ants or steak. Not much of a conundrum as to which way I'd go.