I recently watched Professor Robert Waldinger's Ted talk video 'What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness'. I found out this is a pretty famous video but somehow I never had a chance to watch it before.
Over the past 75 years, Harvard University has conducted research on human life and happiness by dividing about 700 people into two groups. Most of the studies conducted at universities usually end in 10 years. However, this study has been going on for 75 years and is still going on, making it one of the longest-running studies in Harvard's history. Professor Robert Waldinger is the fourth director of the study.
Group 1 is the richest people from Harvard, and Group 2 is the poorest in the Boston slums. From childhood to the present, they checked every part of their life, including interviews, surveys, and health checks.
What were the characteristics of the happiest people revealed through tens of thousands of pages of life data?
Good relationships make us healthy and happy. Studies have shown that people who are closer to society, who are more socially connected, are happier, physically healthier, and live longer than people who lack connections. Solitude turned out to be very harmful. People who were isolated from others beyond what they wanted not only felt less happy, but also worsened health faster in the middle ages, brain function declined earlier, and lifespan was shorter than those who were not lonely.
The study also says that the quality of the relationship is more important than how many friends you have and how dedicated you are.
If I think about now my darkest moment of my life was the time when my relationship with my family was bad. I didn't feel happy no matter what I was doing at that time. Currently, I live my life apart from money, honor, and achievements, etc, but I think that I still have a happy life. Now I know the reason! It was the relationship with the people around me:)
Of course, I can't say that my relationship between me and the people around me is perfect, but after watching this video, I also had time to reflect on the relationship with those who I have been neglected.
How happy your life is?
Well, my life is really happy !! Especially after I have been practising meditation regularly.
But not because my relationships have improved with friends and family. In fact it is kind of the opposite. Since it is the lockdown period going on, I have been separated from them but I am enjoying this alone time. I think I am the happiest when I am on my own.
I think instead of relationship, FORGIVENESS is the key factor here! And it doesn't have to happen face to face. You don't even need to tell anybody that u have forgiven them. You just forgive people from you heart and start loving them instead. That will make you happier because it will take a lot of pressure from you!!
Thanks for this post though.. I enjoyed wondering about it.
You're welcome :)