There is a lot of ways to live life, most of us prefer to believe in God and So the cause of the fear in him we try to do things right as we can. It's how we got older, hearing stories about God's punishment towards the ones who do things against god's will. If one does a good thing cause of his belief in God, that's not a thing that could be called wrong. Even if one with wrong beliefs does a good thing it can be also considered something right. The beliefs don't matter it's all about what one does.
There is also another side to the story, people live their whole life according to the wrong beliefs. That there are things like meaning for a life, that whatever happens, in the end, everything has a meaning. Most people belives there is a reason behind whatever is happening in our life. Everything happens for a reason.\
For a situation where one needs to be optimistic it's a good thought to follow, but there are some places where one needed to understand the reality, their one has to open his eyes and accept the facts.
There is not much of a meaning in the things happening around us, everything is some kind of coincidences and random actions. So thinking there will be something great in the end or believing we are special is a wrong thought. In this universe, there isn't much meaning for our stupid actions. Life is not at all about creating philosophies. It's more like just living.
The whole idea is more about happiness and peace, if you want to travel around and search for happiness, there is nothing out there. A universe is an infinite place, your travel will never end if it's the search for something. Everything is about time, there is only a certain left for one to live his life. So it's all about making it not much boring.
Searching for meaning is unlikely to ever result in much - living with meaning is a different story. It really doesn't matter if there is a general meaning of life, what matters is that since we are aware of our life, we make it mean something to us.
Hope you cheer up soon - feeling tend to come and go - no point getting attached to them :)
Yeah, trying get out of these impulsive feelings.
Hopefully you can break the cycle.