Gonna Lazy So Hard

[jacobts]

I am the laziest person on earth. I wake up in the middle of the night to crashes and choking and I go and check on my grandma. I am so lazy. I go and pull her fist out of her mouth and gently rub her back. What a bum I am. I mean I send emails and facebook messages to friends. I listen to their concerns and answer their questions about what steemit is and can be. I don't tell them I am the laziest though. I got that one guy who likes to hit the beach and take trips to mexico to remind me I am lazy. I sometimes start getting a big head and assume that trying to keep a 9-5 job, take care of elderly loved one, continue dialogue with improvisers, answer questions from friends about crypto, clean a house, and check back in on a loved one with dimensia and I start getting these crazy ideas that I am anything but lazy. I bicycle 2-3 hours a day to and from the day job and that has got to be the stupidest thing in the world am I right? Why don't I just teleport or have money to uber right? I mean only a bum would actually try to go out and meet another human person. Only hard working bloggers stay stuck in the house. I mean what an idiot that I just don't simply have money. If I just wrote more quick memes and asked for more upvotes and begged and begged and begged maybe I would consider myself a hard working person. But no I go and mow the lawn like a lazy bum. I go and pick up the mess that an elderly person leaves around the house. I spend time with someone with dimensia. That has got to be the laziest thing in the world right? How dare anyone on steemit actually sit next to someone with dimensia? How dare anyone who wants to get big rewards go and call a friend or family? How dare anyone just listen to a family member describe a hard day at work. I am so lazy. Like just a minute ago, a bunch of persons sent me posts to check out and I did. Then I left a comment and upvoted them even though I barely have any voting power. What a bum I am. And then that one time when my day job threatened me that I was being watched online. How dare I get scared. I mean, my $5 posts should be enough to give me confidence in the future right? I mean remember that one time those one groups said they were gonna pay me for marketing? What a lazy bum I was to write them reminders to pay? What was I thinking, didn't I know that I wasn't gonna get paid? Like the most simple answer is why don't I just HAVE the money. Right? Like what a downer dude. Totals at eleven. You know what I mean bro? You know? I mean if I was really someone who worked hard, I mean really really worked hard, then I would be chilling on the beach instead of holding an old womans hand and listening to her talk about yesterday. I wouldn't be pulling food off the floors and cleaning the mountain of tissue each day. What a lazy bum I am. And again, I got this job, lol, that pays me 9 dollars an hour, lol, and they threaten me not say anything online and then I actually listened to them, lol. I mean what was I thinking? I mean I should have just posted something like this, this post here that will make like what, 50 cents, 2 bucks, and that will pay my phone bill, that will pay my storage unit, that will pay my ticket to Lisbon. You wanna know how Lazy I am? I actually called this guy on the phone, this teacher at Duke University, and we talked for like hours, what a bum I am. And he teaches at Duke University Business School skills in improv communication in the workplace environment. And I was so lazy I asked him all these questions as to what would something like Steemit be useful for in the improv and business world. I asked him for advice on how to cram the 500 year old tradition of improv into a 5, 10, 20, one hour conversation for people who not only don't know what improv is but often have a negative opinion of it, namely that since it is not marketing, investing, or coding directly it might be lazy. Then I like, listened to him like a lazy ass and he described in a compassionate way how to accept that others have a negative view of things they do not understand. I mean I am such a bum that I listened to him. And I am so lazy I actually thanked him for his time and want to buy his book. That's another thing. Lazy people read books. I got all these books around the house that I can read while sitting next to an old woman and it is just a reminder how lazy I am. Oh get this, so I want to build this community on steemit for improvisers, but most improvisers don't care about the money, they just care about the community and creativity. And so I been asking them what they want to do with steemit, and asking who is interested in helping a community grow. And there are a couple of fellas who are so lazy they started blogging on steemit and saying hello to people and I was like, whoah buddy you gotta try harder and just be rich already. I mean rich money bling gotta dollar show the numbers rolling money honey money. And they were like, turn it down shill meister. And I was like, you right, what was I thinking? And they were like, we love you. And I was like I love you. And we laughed about the old times and being on stage. Can you believe how lazy we improvisers were by working full time jobs and then going to rehearsals and then doing shows, sometimes 8-10 shows a week. So damn lazy am I right? What a bunch of bums. We should have been taking pictures and posting and contests contests contests money money money but no we are like, "Remember when they said Community and we thought that meant like, the word, Community?" And we all just laughed cause we were not chilling at the beach, we were sleeping in the streets cause we didn't wanna be a downer. Wanna know how to get rich? It's easy, no secret. You give it all away. No, you take it all in. No, you share. No you contest. No you leave a link. No you bitconnect. No, you HODL. No you never show emotion. No, you show all the emotions. No, you write it down. No you don't. Whatever you do. As long you can chill on vacation and eat steak and get other people to do the work you say you gonna pay them for but don't then you can call others lazy. No wait, it's the other way around. Whatever you do, don't post a brainstorm session. Whatever you do just get rich. Whatever you do don't show appreciation. Whatever you do, don't keep your head up. Whatever you do, don't already apply for a passport and get plane tickets and arrange for a place to stay in Lisbon on someone's floor, that would be lazy. It would be super lazy to check those emails and facebook and tell those people to be patient with the onboarding process. It would be lazy to arrange to teach some improv to portuguese talented players. It would be lazy to email London Improv teams and Amsterdam impro teams to see if they are interested in learning comedia del arte and short form and long form. It would be lazy to sit outside away from the choking and the banging of the old woman cause she is ok, she said she is ok, how do I know? I don't know. But sometimes she is just banging and choking and so maybe a notebook to write out the goals to return to in Los Angeles. NOW THAT is lazy. All that goes into living in Los Angeles and teaching improv and ghost writing. Talk about lazy, the idea of writing 110 pages of a story in a screenplay format that one can not post on steemit. Why would anyone be doing anything other than something that can't be put on twitter or facebook or is not making money. Why would anyone spend time writing one or two drafts of something that nobody is gonna see in hopes of a career in, dare I say it, no I won't. Cause finishing that sentence would be lazy. So lazy to think that trying to afford transportation out of town to any place other than the beach. And trading. I mean what a jerk I am to go on Trading View and check a chart while sitting next to an old woman. While listening to the shaking and the stories. What a jerk I am to look over my shoulder at the charts and wonder if I can make a little money. Making money is lazy. No, it is not making money that is lazy. But wait, I thought I was being lazy cause I was poor. No I am being lazy cause I don't want to be poor. Wait, i am being lazy cause i am not upvoting myself. Wait, I am being lazy by upvoting myself. Wait, why wasn't I in that banter session about the thing and the deal? Because I was being lazy and picking up that melon and sugar that was all over the egg that on the back of the chair. How did it get there? I don't know, just pull her pants back up and lucky nobody is in the house all the time. She called him homeless. I am homeless. I am lazy for wanting to type a few words on Trading View to better understand charts, to better learn, so that I could manage the $5, $10 dollar posts that are racking it in. It's not about the money. It is about the money. Well which is it? Just make sure you go and upvote and comment on everyone's thing and don't post. Cause we need you sharing this and that and what a camper not doing anything but being lazy. Total camper and lazy cause I was trying to assemble a team of friends to launch something special, to have direction. Such a lethargic bum who wanted to plan and ask friends to be a part of this. Lazy because I didn't just do it for me. Lazy cause I thought of others. Lazy cause I was human and threatened by the job that pays. Lazy cause I held her hand and looked her in the eye and held her. Lazy cause I took phone calls from family. Lazy cause I emailed and messaged friends with answers. Lazy cause I was learning. Lazy cause I opened a book. Lazy cause I took two hours to bicycle someplace instead of teleporting. Lazy cause I made a shake and stretched, how dare I take care of my health. Lazy cause did her laundry. Lazy cause I listened to a friend talk about how hard it is being a dad, being a son, being rich, being poor, being far away, doing shows, not doing shows. Lazy cause I planned. Lazy cause I wrote pages that nobody need see. Lazy cause I did as the big dawg with the dollar said and kept it a secret. Lazy cause I listened. Lazy cause I started writing a book and am not publishing every chapter like another friend encouraged me to do so. Lazy cause I listened to him too. Lazy cause I miss the others and wrote letters that no, they will not see, cause the shame can be a downer. Lazy cause I fell asleep with my head on the keyboard. Lazy cause I stacked the deck. Lazy cause I built a bridge. Lazy cause I said I was sorry. Lazy cause I let her go years ago and have not called. Lazy cause I didn't blast the link. Lazy cause I didn't drop a K on some hard drive to make a hundo. Lazy cause I didn't hit the beach and chill out hoping someone else would do the work for me cause I called them lazy. Lazy cause I did it all. Lazy cause I got your back. Lazy cause I forgive you kid. Lazy cause I stood up sat down walked away came running back. Lazy cause I know I do not know and never has been never wanna be. Lazy cause I read the papers from 1996 that spell out the blockchain and the satoshi lie they will use to enchant the trojan horse. Lazy cause I rode the horse through the gates anyway. Lazy cause I cared and prayed for you. Lazy cause I cared about you. Lazy cause I cared. Me never forget, I am no thing, no one, no body. We me ez pz gonna lazy so hard. Maybe compassion for a man in Texas who is caring for his father. Maybe my heart will always remember his kindness. Maybe he too had someone call him lazy, maybe it was the same guy that called us both lazy. I know that he is not. But me I know I am. Nobody is more lazy than me. Nobody. This I own. This I know. This she does not see. Cause maybe she is scared, remembers being left alone. Remembers caring for her brothers and sister, caring for the little ones in the home, tending the garden, reuniting with her mother, meeting a man, raising a family, tending the grandchildren. Maybe she remembers she endured. Maybe the arms around her remind her of the father she said I look like, the one she never knew.

Comments

[diebaasman]

To lazy to use paragraphs. LOL

Anyway the list of things you do, you are definitely not lazy.
Taking care of sick elderly people is a full time job sometimes.
I take my hat off to you.

[jacobts]

Thank you. Appreciate someone understanding. It's full time exhausting confusing sometimes.

[lordoftruth]

No my friend, you are not lazy
you need more time to do something but you doing well
I hope to be same you
Thanks for sharing
Have a great friday

[jacobts]

Appreciate that Truth. You have a great weekend too.

[improv]

You know you.

[jacobts]

I'm the brat worst. LOL.

[improv]

Oof. Flag on the play. Intentional groaning.

[ultramylk]

Lazy cuz...someone's in your head telling you you're lazy no matter what you. You know, some people only hire lazy people because they find the fastest and most efficient way to get something done ( so they can go back to being lazy ) no to mention the incredible invisible value in day dreaming. Care giving is ex'hausting...especially for someone so empathetic. Be gentle with yourself too. And steem on!

[jacobts]

Appreciate your kind words. What a day it was today. Should have made another post. Have a good one and thanks again.

[ultramylk]

Oh wow...I just realized how are posts connect with being gentle to ourselves! Isn't synchronicity and steemit amazing?! Very cool

[omarbitcoin]

I am so Glad to have a new lazy friend, i hope to lazy just like you, Thanks!

[jacobts]

stay lazy homie :)

[pagandance]

Too lazy to read all this shit :-P

[locoestaban]

I hear you pal. It can all get a little overwhelming sometimes. Just went through 2 1/2 years with Katie's mom. It's not easy being a caregiver and having to live your own life as well. You're making it work for you though, kid.

by the way - I loved the, "Can you believe how lazy we improvisers were by working full time jobs and then going to rehearsals and then doing shows, sometimes 8-10 shows a week. So damn lazy am I right?" I have been guilty of calling myself a "lazy improviser". Never thought of it that way.

[virtualgrowth]

Too lazy to spend time talking with me and helping with a place to stay and preparing food a couple times too! Could've fooled me. Just keep doing what you love as you do in your own way.