This was by far one of the most thought-intriguing posts I have ever read. It is a feeling I could only kinda relate to. Might seem like an odd comparison, but between the transition between steemit and Hive, I was away from the blockchain as a whole working as a translator.
The job was mundane and easy, a few weeks in I was on autopilot. And I could honestly say I remember like 8-9 things during the entire year and a half I spent working there, and that includes my off-work time.
After that, at least for a while, it felt like I was playing catch up with my thoughts and feelings.
I really love the surrealism imagery, whether in text or pictures, that you used here. Using the unfamiliar to explain the familiar.
Sorry, I could type here forever (and I did before realizing how much I wrote and decided to cut it down), but this was an excellent piece.
I just woke up and so far the only thing I can think of in response is, you must not read or get out much.
Of course leaving it there would make me appear to be a dickhead, even though I'm knocking myself down, so I've provided this sentence to help clear up any confusion.
All dumb jokes aside. It is strange how one can live so much but remember so little. So many days blend into the next. Then we're left with only the extremes. The best days and bad days stand out.
No need for clarification, I have followed you long enough to know where your heart is. And the statement is true, technically. I do read a lot, but even that I do in the line of research in an attempt to write a post. The one about going out is 100% accurate though.
Like, I do appreciate the beauty in a movie, TV show, a book, even analyzing a football match. But, and this is the part where your post hit resonated with me, it later becomes a part of this content creation process. Like, there isn't something about me that's mine at the moment. All my thoughts are monetized and subject to criticism/praise lol!
I remember the times where I was actually living. But those memories do feel like they happened in an alternative. And somehow my conclusion that is implanted in me is that I will find peace once I leave Iraq and somehow manage to be more alone.
I was diagnosed with mild dissociative disorder, let's hope that's the cause hahaha!
And with all things aside, thank you for this piece. It did give me a lot to think about.
We all become products of our environment, man. Nobody is immune. I know exactly what you mean by your thoughts not being your own. When I'm in this mode, creating, whatever, the only thing I put in my head is music. I shut the rest of the world off. If I'm working on art I don't look at other art. Don't want to be influenced. Then when things get too hectic, that's when I vanish from here. I'll be gone for months at a time. This last time I even disconnected from the internet. All I was left with were my days and thoughts living out in the middle of nowhere, alone. Said in my previous post I got learn who I am all over again and become friends with that being. I see a lot of people on this planet when I come online simple products of what they consume. You are what you eat.