Such a beautiful perspective. l've been thinking about this a lot lately - what if I just lived the life I wanted? What if I only do what I want? How can I be someone who hopefully enriches the lives of others as well as my own?
Then , as you know, I found out I'm gonna be a mom - and these thoughts are daily. It's not just about me now - I've always been a perma student - but hopping from interest to interest - a dabbler. Piano, guitar, trumpet, Arabic, Spanish - etc. Now, I feel like I must pursue my hobbies, and dedicate my life to what I want so I can be a badass mom.
The moment you decided to live life on your terms - and become the best you - you did the whole world a favor because we can all learn and find inspiration in all that you share.
Keep at it :-)
You can give the most love when you give yourself love
You might find later that all the things you dabbled in serve some kind of purpose and that they tie together in some roundabout way. Just keep doing what excites you, I'm sure being an amazing mom will be on the top of the list
:-)