I was able to give one of my old work colleagues today some cash to secure a house to rent for himself. He was made redundant at the same time as me last year, and unfortunately hasn't been as lucky as me. He has a lot more disabling things going on in his life right now, he's a single parent, and most of the time he struggles to find the necessary focus needed to take the skills he has learned into the wider community. He needs a manager, and because of this he has taken a job well below his skillset (in my opinion).
He's being made homeless at the end of this month, and as a result he's had to look hard for another place to live. Luckily for him he's found a nice home that suits his needs. Unlucky for him he needs a first months deposit to place down for his place of rent. And because he hasn't the funds in his account to pay the full amount I offered to pay the rest for him. And, he can pay me back whenever. Truth be told I don't expect him to pay me back, but he won't see this, so I'm not worried.
To me this gave me an awesome sense of satisfaction, my good deed for today, a reinforcement to myself of my own personal worth, and to him, a godsend, because no-one else was offering, and he had fully committed do doing extra work, looking for odd jobs here and there. Now he can focus on what matters.
The result? We're both extremely happy.
Positivity - I swear it's infectious.
Now you could argue that this deed was absolutely an act of selfishness, one to boost my ego and make it sound like I'm this some kind of brilliant person to know in an extremely covert act of manipulation, but that would require that I hold it against him for his life
"remember that time I saved you a nice home?"
Those subtle hidden meanings that tell the recipient, "You owe me".
No, it'll be nice if I get it back, but in all honesty I wouldn't be surprised if I never see it again. It wasn't really for him, you see.
Whenever I do something good for someone it's to reinforce my own set of morals, my own integrity and my own self-worth. This is essential in my opinion, because the more I do this, the less I look to others to determine my worth. If I think about it realistically that's why people give. They give because they can, and they want to. Don't confuse that with someone that gives to manipulate though!
When someone gives something there should be no unwritten contract, no secret law of conformity to untold rules. If I want it back, I'll tell them. There's no shame in that. Or if I need a favour, I'll tell them too!
Positivity to me is a very selfish subject. I very much like to lead by example. If I'm not happy and positive, if not every day I don't get up and think to myself 'Carpe Diem' then I wouldn't be writing about it, because it would be bad for me, and everyone else if I wasn't feeling it.
One of the first lessons I learned in being positive and changing the way people perceived me in general was to give without return. Give all the time, but give only if you have it to give. So no giving your friend a chair if you only have one chair! It would be the same as me going without lunch to feed the homeless guy. Whilst that in itself is really commendable, I'm not looking after number 1. And that's me.
Why look after yourself first and foremost? It seems stupid that I'm even asking this.
Well, if I was homeless I doubt I'd be in the proper mindset to sell homes to rich people. The same can be said for preaching 'love and commitment in relationships' if I had been married four times and had a thousand relationships in between. These aren't the proper attitudes as I simply couldn't lead by example.
So I ask you again community. Can you do something selfless this week?
Help an old lady across the road
Buy a homeless man dinner
Give something you have plenty of. And want nothing for it back. And eventually, you'll start to see what I mean.
Peace out.
And be well :)
source: quotepixel.com
Beautiful :)
If we all did that, can you imagine the world we would all live in?! :)
One could only hope, friend. One could only hope! :)
You mean this?
Ahh, Russel Brand - he's one of my faves :)
👍
Very good post @lifeisawesome and representations as well!
In this age of being the fastest pc/MAC sms typer people forget the smallest things.
What do you expect a man with noting to give you?
I seen in the streets people who had nothing giving to other people that had less than nothing...and that always brakes my heart and make me reflet on what kind of person I am.
So very, very true - it's why #project-positivity has taken that into account with the next challenge. Not everyone has money togive, or belongings, or happiness! Simple company with other people is time best spent in my opinion :)
Upvoted :):)
Thank you :)
excellent written, I congratulate you on your way to being, a will have many blessings thanks for sharing
Thank you - you always write such lovely things on my posts :)
I know all about that!
Though I guess its in a way impossible to give without some kind of want in return. I do it because I want to be a benefit to this world and people. I want to live honorably and with sustainable purpose.
My organization fed 40,000 free meals last year, facilitated hundreds of hours of free workshops/education, clothed and sheltered hundreds and saved 350,000 lbs of trash from the landfill to name a few of gifts.
Yet I didn't charge for any of it, nor get paid. I was rewarded with fulfillment of honorable purpose~
Best Regards~*~
Exactly. This is it. Giving for nothing, you nailed it in one :)
Oh, ps. What is your company and can I get involved? I'm lacking any sort of voluntary position right now.
Yes you sure can!
the web site for my organization is www.intothegardenofeden.com and the Steemit Account for it is @gardenofeden please check it out and let me know what you think and how you might want to get involved!
If you pop on and have a word with me on steemit chat I have a few ideas already :)
ok will do!
Love this! I totally get it. I have been on both the giving and receiving end of this positivity. Way to spread the hope!
Thank you! :)
Good point. Hardest for me to give without wanting something in return.
Up voted and your up voting my contents will be appreciated.
Thanks and good day!
Be Free Always, All Ways!
Thank you :)
Gift economy FTW~!
Yup! Agree lol
I love this! Doing things for others without asking for anything in return goes against the social norm so it causes people to stop and think.
It can be abused by people and others can manipulate you into helping out, so it is wise to know what and who you can afford to help out.
I think with friends, sometimes it is best to help out giving money instead of lending. Too many times when you lend money, that person has something happen and is unable to pay back the money when they had hoped and now feels awkward and tries to avoid the lender.
It can cause unwanted tension, so like you did I think gifting someone something is the best way and if that person wishes to pay you back that is an awesome act of acknowledgement and appreciation too.
Helping people almost always leads to some joyous moments :) Keep posting great content like this!
Thank you - and yup, you're right! Check out Positivity, challenge #3: https://steemit.com/positivity/@positivity/positivity-challenge-3-10-10-2016 for a cool introduction for what I want to achieve :)
I couldn't lend it to him in the hope I'd get it back - his situation is far too difficult for me to weigh something like that over his head. Yup, you're right! And like you say, it raises unrealistic expectations of each other :)
You are welcome.
Give and not expect a return. When i lost my job as a result of the economic crisis in Greece i thought that this could be a challenge for me. Instead of searching for a new one i decided to help people around in the community with any way i could. So i decided to offer my services as an acupuncture practitioner for free. It's been 3 years now i treat people for free and the results are amazing. I never had such a return of love from people i don't know . Also since i started this i never felt alone or poor. Love is in the air and you have to abandon your ego in order to feel it . There is always a return of every action you do in your life. Let me just comment your last sentence "Give something you have plenty of"... i would suggest "Share something" .
Thank you again for the opportunity you gave me to share this with you.
Aha! Lovely thing to say - I would also say that you're spot on with what you say. You have plenty of time - give someone your time - it doesn't need to be material :)
This post has been linked to from another place on Steem.
Aggroed's Antidote, Treating your News Feed October 10th 2016 edition by @aggroed
Positivity Challenge #3 10/10/2016 by @positivity
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