This:
So for those with great families... good for you! How nice. But for those with no family, abusive, neglectful, absentee families, stop believing the lie that somehow you must have "family" to be healthy, happy, and normal. Let yourself off the hook. There is no justifiable reason to believe this is the norm, no matter what "Leave it to Beaver" or "Father Knows Best" or "The Cosby Show" might have tried to teach you. It's made up. Nice if it works out... but shouldn't be expected.
And this:
It's okay to love your family... if they are lovable. But please, free yourself of the expectations of society that would cast a shadow on your life just because that isn't true.
Yes, yes, yes. I am so grateful for your elaboration on this topic. This piece is full of compassionate gems. I feel like we could write back and forth on this for awhile. I may have a post simmering in my mind on how we "assemble" non-blood families today.
You are always too kind, and I appreciate your generous comments. I can't wait to read what's churning in your thoughts. If we could help free people from the "obligation" of having perfect milk/water families, which are rarely the case if we're honest, and allow them to feel just as accomplished and successful in their relationships when dealing with chosen tribe members, then this could relieve a great deal of stress and prevent the endless and sometimes hopeless pursuit of people's affection who haven't the ability to give it properly.
I am really thinking on this. I thought for sure something wiuld come out today, but this is a very resonant topic for me. I’m glad you’re willing to read. I will see if it feels good to write tomorrow!