Dear Shadow;
You are a badass wonder bitch; only drinking coffee at midnight. Your spite-filled moments are not right; I know all you want to do is live your life. It’s you that is the true queen, even when parts of you descend to hell. Your crown still sits in the heavens. Smoking a pack-a-day, you are always compromising. I catch you stealing and you will not confess. Your hair: long, matted and a mess. But, you don’t care a thing about that — eh? You hate babies and surprises. Shitting on everyone whose ever loved you; just to be alone. Have I ever told you I love you? You’ll make a fine mediator; I’ll give you a job, maybe you won’t have to sit in the bathtub all day. I want you to live your life — let’s go on the journey together. You can even use drugs once-in-a-while. My confidence is tragic; I need the integrate the shape of your body. Your intuition is magic.
I used to love to sit at home with you — to rip on the president. And we’d laugh at the stupidity of others; ignorant armchair critics, full of judgment. I can’t live up to our gold standards without you standing next to me in the morning sun. Let’s stop gossiping about Suzy’s sister Sara; and let’s take down that empire with our pen. Let’s live up to the dreams we both had in the silence in the night. You told me about all the girls you wanted to kiss; and I told you about how I wanted to save myself for marriage. You looked at gay porn while I masterbated. Come on; I am willing to play along. I will not keep you locked in that closet any longer. Come out from the shadows, darling — let me see you in all your dark glory. You look like a mad woman straight from hell; similar to Angelina Jolie. I want you in my life. I’ll lay down the Bible. I’ll help you seek the revenge we dreamed about; they aren’t going to get away with it. I’ll write about the those billion dollar drug lords protected by our government. You can say all the defamatory things you want; I’ll polish it. I am the bad guy? No, I am the angel on the human’s shoulder. You, my friend are the devil. We need each other; you’ll still let me love theology? I can still read the Bible myths before bed; be with me again! Let’s get out of our room — stand up on our atrophied legs. Get up, already!
Twenty nine is right around the corner; soon thirty, forty, fifty — when will we die? A better question is when will we start living? I am so grateful for you; I really want to be the Queen. When you think about your life — what do you want? The only person I want to collaborate with is you, dearest bite. I’ll drink coffee with you at midnight. I think your timing is unusual, and I’ll abide by the slow pace that you need. I’ve thought about your truths and my lies, will you forgive me? It was me that was crazy the whole time; shadow, you were sane. You are beautiful with your red lipstick on. I love the lingerie you’ve begun putting on. Thank you for starting back up that little box idea you had when we were young. Your just like me, you hate to be alone. Let’s chat awhile; let’s think about our lives. I heard you screaming; I came running. I choose life, I choose us.
It’s almost midnight? I’ll grab a bowl and some coffee? What do you think? Can I see the shape of your body in the moonlight? It’s like my intuition is magic.
Your Better Half,
@laurabell