Can empathy harm you and when is it dangerous to be an empath?
Introduction:
Empaths are sensitive people who can adjust to foreign waves without even being able to control it. They are often called "the healers of the world". They are the people with exaggerated senses, not only aware of the existence of different energies in the world, but also making them feel like their own. People around them probably think that the ability to feel the feelings of others is a gift, but if you can convince an empath to tell you about his abilities you will understand that it isn‘t a matter of great joy at all. In fact, very often it is a gift that is not pleasant to possess. Because of their abilities, many people rely on them for support. An empath is almost always trustworthy because he can make others feel safe. But while the empath is capable of coping with the emotions of others, he is left with the stress that he needs to deal with alone.
The dark side of empathy often occurs in the form of two contradictory voices, two constantly disputed points of view in their heads. They constantly hear both good and bad, negative and positive. This is the reason why they are prone to depression, stress and anxiety. For an empath, it is vital to learn how to calm anxiety to stay calm and balanced.
How to deal with the negative effects?
Empats are prone to negative energies in life. It is really important for them to develop boundaries as constantly putting others first is not a healthy way to live. Your boundaries may be different than mine as we have different personalities. The first and most important thing is to put yourself first. It is not selfish and you shouldn’t feel bad about it.
Here are some practices that may help you maintain emotional balance:
- scheduling some quiet time on your own to recharge
- limiting the time you give to people who drain you emotionally
- making time for the things that are important to you
If you don’t have and you can’t establish boundaries you may begin to feel the physical effects of being an empath. I’ve had days with headaches after listening to my friend’s problems all day long and actually relating to her pain. At that time, I didn’t know that I am an empath and I had no idea where my headaches came from. So, it is important to start taking care of yourself and for that you can start with a simple yoga routine or you can just exercise in a quiet place at home with some music on.
Your nervous system can also get overloaded if you are constantly listening to people’s fears and complaints. If you start feeling down or anxious you can learn how to calm yourself with some techniques to soothe your nervous system:
- taking time for meditation or mindfulness routine
- using relaxing essential oils such as lavender or chamomile or whichever oils make you feel relaxed
- protect yourself by learning emotional shielding techniques. For example, I surround myself with fire in my head and this stops the negative energies from entering and destructing my positive ones
Empaths often find it hard to distinguish which emotions belong to them and which to others. This is why empaths often feel anxious without knowing why. In order to sort out our own feelings and emotions, from those of others we have to get to know our innermost selves better. You can start:
- keeping a journal
- engaging in creative pursuits - art, cooking, gardening
- going somewhere alone and having some time for yourself without having to worry about someone else's feelings
The most important things that empaths need to do is surround themselves with honest, positive and not self-absorbed people. This will help them preserve their energy. It is particularly difficult for them when they have to interact with narcissists, ego-maniacs and energy vampires. You can look at these top people as predators, and the empaths are their prey. Communicating with this type of people drains their energy all the way, and they need a long recovery. Around people who lie or pretend, empaths usually can't function normally because they can't quickly capture their true nature. It is best to avoid such people.
Preserve your energy
You should give your loved ones and friends closer attention and limit it to everyone else. Yes, the casual people in our lives sometimes play a huge role in it and we shouldn’t close our senses to them, but it is especially important for empathic people to limit their contacts.
You should look for those who value and love you as you are. Who don’t take advantage of your desire to help, listen, comfort.
You must find ways to heal and recover from encounters with toxic people. No matter how - privacy, communication with nature, music, walks, sleep. But you have to devote this time to yourself.
Conclusion:
In conclusion, I will say that being an empath is not a bad thing as long as you learn how to preserve your energy and how to differentiate your own emotions from others'. We all need to be more empathetic towards people around us. Empathetic communication can help you understand the person in front of you. It is an expression of sincere concern and openness to self-similarity. According to Stephen Covey, the trust that comes from this type of communication provides the oxygen that helps our relationships breathe and develop in the future. This is because listening with empathy makes us forget about our own vision and interpretation of what is happening. It helps us immerse ourselves completely in a new world without evaluating and breaking events through the ideas of right and wrong!
If you are not an empath but you want to learn about empathetic listening here is something from Stephen Covey: Using Empathetic Listening to Collaborate
Thank you for reading!
If you find yourself in these words or you just want to share your opinion, please do it in the comments.
Sources:
Images:
Pixabay
Really, @alien.nation, expressing too much of our empathy towards the other people will be disastrous, when such people don't understand how to handle the situation and express themselves more politely. We don't have to create unnecessary worry, fear, or anxiety, for ourselves, when there is no real or contingent reason behind this. I mean, this kind of situation may bring about negative effects, emotions, or consequences.
I am @gboyegaogunmola. I am a writer. I am writing article on the topic "psychological aspect of man". I want people to solve personal problems, through reading my "personality literature".
In counselling situations, the people who have a personal problem will require a little emphatic feeling or relationship with a positively-oriented and adjusted fellow, who must be in the position to help them to change into a better condition of life, when they speak out the negative thoughts which they are experiencing and disregarding. I mean that, the counsellor will have to empathise and feel the condition of guilt which a client experienced, most importantly, during their professional relationship in Counselling Psychology.
I agree with you that, we don't have to express too much of emphatic feeling to the others, as this will distort the perception of an actual situation, and bring a negative consequence to the relationship.
Empathy should never be used without our consideration.
It is not bad to me an empath as long as you know where to draw the line, and as long as you recognize people draining your energy.
Thank you for your comment!
I definitely feel this way. Sometimes I feel being so empathetic is a curse. I give a homeless person some cash and think about for days or even weeks. When it turns winter in Chicago I feel sorry for animals that are outside, and people who dont have homes. (To the point that I lay awake at night thinking about it) When people have troubles I get so stressed out that I dont even want to see anyone. I dont even watch the news anymore. Thanks for the tips, I will look into managing it better.
I stopped watching the news years ago just because I used to feel really bad every time I heard bad things happen to people all over the world.
Not being able to manage it can be crucial for your health - emotionally and physically.
Take care of yourself! :)