A fight against ourselves.
And I know this fight too. This feeling that there is something in us that works against us.
Not nice!
The good thing is: you can end this fight. You can stop fighting yourself.
How does it work?
This begins with understanding. By understanding how this works with our willpower at all.
Then we develop understanding.
Understanding for ourselves.
Because understanding comes from understanding.
And if you understand better how this works with your will power, 2 things will probably happen:
You will start looking more kindly at yourself.
You will be able to strengthen your will power systematically, because you understand the connections.
So how does it work with willpower?
This model is the core of our training project "Willenskraft".
The most important thing is that you grasp one thing: Willpower is not a personal property that you have or not.
Will power is more like a battery. And this battery is rather filled or less filled, depending on the life situation and personal thinking and action patterns.
For example, she fills herself every night when we sleep, automatically.
And every time we apply our willpower, the battery level of the willpower battery becomes less.
I leave the piece of cake lying. Phew. Heavy. But I can do it. Thus we have consumed a piece of willpower, and when the battery is empty, we can no longer say "no".
That's why we usually have more willpower in the morning than in the evening.
And you can charge this willpower battery. The possibilities are shown in the graphic around the plus sign.
There are also things that suck the will power out of our bones. For example fear, perfectionism, overburden, etc.
Important here: It is usually enough to turn on one or two of these set screws and you have already increased your will power.
And that is exactly what we do in my training. As you learn how to bobble your will power like a little baby.
So that your will power gets bigger and bigger and gets an ever bigger capacity. So that the battery is always charged. So that you have the will and the strength to do as often as possible what is good and right for you.
So that you can manage to say no, if no is the right answer.
The model above is the start of everything.
Fine. Now you know how this works with willpower. And from tomorrow onwards, you will then implement your goals and projects with the determination of a bull terrier. Or?
Unfortunately, no. You can not play the piano just because you know how the notes are called and where the appropriate keys are on the keyboard.
Knowing something usually does not help so much.
One must also apply the knowledge and practice it. Again and again and again. So long until it's automatic.
You need a training in which you can transform yourself a bit. So that you do then automatically and at the right time the right thing.
In our case:
Recharge your own self-discipline by cunning procedures.
To diminish or abolish the factors that weaken our willpower.
Use our will power only where it is really important. Because if it is a limited resource, then we have to keep it well.
Especially point 3 is important because it means that we must sometimes be lazy and undisciplined, so that we can develop our full force elsewhere.
Willpower is sometimes abundant to me but is also a rare commodity sometimes. It's usually after a negative moment -like a fight, and high when I'm in a good mood. I guess managing your mood also helps.
Yep @deemonica, managing your mood is key. It is very related to willpower, among a ton of other important things as well.
But managing your mood might be considered one of, if not THE core thing to work on. As it affects every thought you have and action you take. That's when willpower comes in..
Whatever mood you are in, thought you are having, or action you are about to take.. Willpower is when you stop for a second, consider what's best for you and for all, then CHANGE it if that's what you desire. Willpower is decisive action, as opposed to just a mood-influenced REaction.
I hope this helps. Just stay mindful and you'll go far.
See how you've inspired me, @tradewonk?! Such awesome, let's keep it up!
Thanks @willywonka! Managing my willpower is actually not my strength but I am practicing to control it rather than letting it a reaction of my mood. I actually have a mentor in harnessing my willpower. He has been a great influence on me since the day we met. 😀
Your post resonated with me bigtime! This is how I've been thinking about willpower in my own self-help travels, and I rarely hear or read people talking and thinking like this. Such a grand topic that could be discussed in depth. It could help so many people. I'm glad you brought it up. Kudos @tradewonk