and I’m not gonna
carry your baggage for you
even if it is
Louis Vitton
but I’ll take care
of mine
Possibly one of the loveliest love declarations I've read. Ever. I feel this one deeply (though belatedly, by grace of a mutual friend sharing it, apparently). Every syllable is so raw, and I adore that in a writer. You can tell every bit of this was felt intensely. I love the ending, too. IT's so un-poem-y (in a traditional poem sense, at least) that it's extraordinarily poetic. If that makes sense. <3 I know you're still creating beauty, I hope you continue to do so, and I'm glad to have found you in the meantime (between you writing this and now). <3 Have a lovely weekend.
What a great creative soul you are. This comment is a poem in and of itself. Thank you, beautiful 😍
Glad we met along the way as well. I'm taking some sunshine and barefoot paths at the moment but will always find you to visit and see what you're making.
Yes. We must create or lose our souls!
I found a pattern I want to knit this morning if you can believe it. I know, right? But I have an idea and it must be unleashed. And I know fuckall about knitting. Reads like a foreign language. Lots to learn!
Please do keep me in the loop with your personal journey if you feel like it. Or not. The better part of a journey towards individuation must be done alone... but here if you wobble, okay?
Sending love and warmth 💕 :)
<3 barefoot in the sunshine sounds pretty good.
Really? That's so cool, that you just get an idea and go with it. Rock on ;) Hoping you share it here when it's done, and here's to many more. Who knows, knitting might prove to be a great love.
I'm glad you say that. Only earlier, I was contemplating it. To be fair, I got very triggered by even the idea I might have trauma. It was like, what, me? Never. But I've been doing a lot of introspection, and a lot of journaling since we last talked, and the more I dig, the more surprising things I'm finding about myself. That moment when a piece of the puzzle falls into place, and you wonder how come you never saw it before, you know?
So yeah, I was wondering how much can be done alone. Because I do feel like I'm moving towards something, but then, I wonder, what if I'm just lying to myself? What if it's some subconscious thing that's telling me what I wanna hear, to then conveniently sweep it under the rug?
I don't know, but I did want to tell you how much I appreciated our interaction, and your input and compassion the other day. See, I had this sort of knee-jerk 'no' reaction to the suggestion I might be traumatised/suffering somehow. Except, the last time that happened, the person suggesting it was not a good person, quite insistent on the matter, and really manipulative. Still, while I severed ties, the question remained ~ what if that person really meant well, as they said, and I misunderstood?
Talking to you, I got to see what that suggestion looks like as honest, genuine care input (not self-serving, or duplicitous in any way). I got to see that yeah, I read that situation right, and it was good to know that.
Seriously, though, I appreciate all this a great deal <3 I hope to be able to pass on that same light someday to someone who may need it. Thank you <3
last thing: re the not knowing if it is your stuff to change or not.
If anyone makes you feel "bad" about yourself - that's a no right there. If you find some groups and people cause this - that's a no. Walk away. Find your people. Your people will uplift you and engage healthily and not make you think there is something "wrong" with you or it is all your fault.
See?
You will find you naturally thrive with the healthy people and you bottom out with the toxic ones. There's your answer. It doesn't matter what they say. Or what anyone says. The proof is in your balance and health when you are around them.
How they make you "feel". Do not listen to what people say so much, okay? Because the toxic systems and people run on dishonesty. You can't believe words. You can believe your experience.
<3
<3
I wish I'd known that. Again. Better late than never.
" Finding your people " could be...ok, I wouldn't necessarily say dangerous,but for sure could be blinding. You endup surrounding yourself with people that say,chant and asskissing each other,and that will keep your thinking just in one direction. It's no different then joining a book reading club,a cult ,gang,a religion or a political party... I learned that over the years,don't take my word for it,just my 2 cents...
Ohh, I do get to see it happening right here,with tribes/communitys...90% asskissing
Hmm. I don't know. Not always. I think you can learn to tell, if you're half self-aware, when it's blatant asskissing, and when they're being genuine. I think your people can be extremely grounding, in the sense that they could also help keep you on the right track.
Seems to me it's about finding people you're on the same vibration with, not necessarily people you agree with 100%. On the contrary. If I meet someone whose opinions and general ethics I respect a great deal, they may expose me to new ideas/views on topics we don't agree with. But I don't think everyone gets that, and a lot of people do end up muddled in asskissy echo chambers...
It might sound mean...but I can't wait for you to get older...just wait!
Shit change...you will be like wow, plenty..