Caveats
I feel like this subject is a serious one, serious enough to warrant deep study. I have not been able to give that level of study to it. So what I write here can be treated as a draft or a hypothesis for something I am sure will take much more time to flesh out. I know caveats are typically put at the end of a post, but I wanted to save you time by being upfront about it.
Why write at all about this
One thing I have learned in the short time I have been here in Hive is how global its residents are. It would be interesting to see what inputs come from our friends from different cultures and countries
Is there one kindness
As a human condition, I do think there is one Kindness And a lot of this kindness is universal, and maybe even part of our evolution. For eg. love for a child, helping an elder, being patient with kids, being respectful of the dead, all such behavior can be considered universal.
However, I think that there is another part of kindness that is not so universal. And the kind of kindness that I think does not always translate has to do with a combination of culture, socio-economic conditions, and even political stance.
Political Impact
Let me start with politics, because it is the most irritating at times, sometimes because the actual reason is shallow while other times the reason is blind faith in the mob think.
Thanks to politics people who might have been kind if left on their own seem to be much more reserved in their kindness as part of a political groupthink. For eg. people who believe in the sanctity of all men will still not support charity, or people in opposition will try to put down the govt in power by shooting down any scheme that might help people for fear that it would take away votes.
The problem is sometimes these ad-hoc responses become habits when the political lines are drawn aggressively and the hatred continues to fester for too long. And common people get pulled into this whirlpool of hate and kindness erodes in this cesspool.
Interestingly while I am trying to show diversity this case of political impact seems to be universal as govts across get more corrupt and more autocratic. And it is frustrating to see these groups try to wipe away entire categories of kindness possible in this world.
Socio-Economic Impact
Here I think about how Kindness perception is impacted by the socio-economic situation. For eg. if one is in a country where survival is not in question and people are living at a higher level of quality, it might be easier to be trusting, be polite, and be kind. Add to this the impact of population.
So if you are in a country, or even in a region, or sometimes in a block of the city, if it is poor, or developing, and dense; there is a good chance that kindness is more difficult to practice. To be honest there is no difference in Kindness itself. However, if you are in this dense metro where everyone is hustling to make a better life how can you know if the plea for help is true or just a ploy to get some money? Or if you reach ou to help one person you suddenly have 40 people waiting for help and looking at you accusing you you cannot.
Essentially in places where survival is of utmost importance, Kindness might be sacrificed. Of course, this is also the best scope for applying the large impact of Kindness. And thousands are kind in these circumstances. I look up to them with Awe and/or respect.
Cultural Diversity
And we now come to the big one, cultural diversity.
A person holding open a door for a lady could be a kind act in one group. Another group of people might consider it demeaning.
Certain cultures will consider you asking about their personal lives as a kind action of wanting to know you better. Certain other cultures might think of this question as very impolite and intrusive.
In my culture for eg. we are so used to seeing joint families with generations living together that it is a default kindness to take care of not just your parents but other elders, as well as children too. Other cultures might have developed a more nuclear and independent family group and it may not be considered kind of old parents to stay with their children and impose on them.
In a country like mine which is still developing, has interesting governments, and a media that is always trying to win attention through negative algos, value of a human life is not very high. The group is more important than the individual. In such a scenario most people will find ideas like good self-care and caring for one's own mental health and kindness to self, to be arty-farty words for action that is just some hocus-pocus.
Even within my own country there are regions, especially rural places, where the entire neighbourhood is in each other's business, but at the same time they really care for and take care of each other in times of need. And then there are urban places where neighbours don't even know each other.
And then there are toxic sub cultures everywhere that consider kindness as non macho, and a weakness.
Kindness = unity in diversity
My conclusion from all this thought was that at the end of the day only you can act for yourself. So I would say it is fine. Let the difference of perception of kindness remain, but wherever possible let us get to the true center of kindness. Where one human helps another, and the other can be oneself. But we should be aware of the differences too. Just so we do not inadvertently cause pain when we intend to help.
Epilogue
Pardon me for a bit of a ramble. But all these thoughts pop up and I blame @gregscloud for putting me on this path with his much better analysis of kindness. It is interesting that thinking of Kindness is taking me through thought experiments one after the other.
Source:
- Image created by me using DaalE on Open.Ai site. All images are sections cut from this main image.
As always a very good read and some good perspectives to consider. You can blame kindness on me all you like lol! It is interesting though to think through what things could be treated very differently between even people who have many things in common. It is especially pointiest right now in our election year.
Gone are the days when opposing parties would come together for the common good, I know there have always been party lines in politics, but never like we have today. It is good to remember that agreeing to disagree when two people or opposing groups have differing viewpoints, is an honorable quality from yesteryear. That's about as safe as there is to approach that without the risk of offending anybody.
It is refreshing and healthy to have discussions and difficult conversations, learn about different cultures, traditions and beliefs, alas some people are unable to understand that, or perhaps not allowed to. Children know no fear, no bias, no hatred, no malice, until they are taught, weather directly, or by watching. I think everyone needs to see that as a species, we need to unite and realize the vast things we have in common, agree to disagree on the things we don’t, and leave a more peaceful world and way of life to our children and grandchildren.
Thanks again for another great post, excuse the spelling and grammar, I’m entering using my iPad, with no checker turned on lol.
I am sure there are a lot of cultural differences around the world. I think the test is how you treat people who are different to you. Differences can be in gender, race, wealth, politics or 'caste'. I was raised in the Christian tradition that had a lot about kindness, but it seems people who call themselves Christians are quite intolerant of 'outsiders'.
As for politics, there is a lot of cynicism that is encouraged by those who want to disrupt the system. I don't believe that all politicians are corrupt or self-serving. People do go into it to do good, as in other fields. We tend to hear more about the 'bad eggs'. I find that generalising about anything tends to be wrong.
I agree about not generalising @steevc. But in my country politics has become that murky. It is not like in UK for eg. cause just getting elected even in the lowest level of govt is so costly that it cannot be done by a person just wanting to do good. To be fair, I am sure their intent might still be good. However the modern idea of "ends justifies the means" leads to quite a slippery slope :(
The point about Christians you made is one of the reason I am so irritated with formal religions across the world. If you consider Sri Ram in India, Jesus Christ in Christianity, or of course Buddha himself; they are all icons of kindness in the stories we know of them. And yet their disciples seem to have lost their way in the name of pride, practicality or justified means :(
Still the fact that there are people like you and others here who still hold a torch to a kinder humanity will be the hope we need to continue to build on.
Others have said that you don't need religion to be kind, but cruel things have been done by the faithful. Politics is in a mess generally and can be very divisive. We need leaders who will try to bring people together. I'm suspicious of any who encourage or fail to condemn violence.
Today I believe that politics is so vile and full of lies and falsehood. Every day we see how in the world, the different political entities in each country only stick to power and how to preserve it, doing everything necessary to not leave it. The politicians are not kind, none of them. #dreemerforlife
Two points strike my mind in this article. First is the way politicians weaponized kindness with ulterior motives. During elections, you see them showing kindness to get votes but after assuming office, the kindness die down.
Another thing is what you stated about kindness being commonly shown in rich neighborhoods. This is exactly the case from my experience. People that are struggling financially find it hard to be kind in most cases. Thank you for the beautiful piece. This is beyond a draft @brijwhiz, 😂
#dreemerforlife
you are too kind @lightpen
I find that I have all these thoughts, but i end up writing them as they pop out. In a kind and supportive group like outs it works as the ideas themselves are important. But I don't edit, and I think i should give more time and try and edit my posts, thereby giving more thought on what I am putting together and how I want to showcase it. Basically trying to become a more impactful writer. Alas old habits are dying very slowly :)
My mind was drawn to several experiences when you spoke about a person holding a dir for someone being considered as “manners” for some people and a whole different thing for another person
It’s actually like that
Actually in my part of the worl normally people would say you are kind when you give money a lot..that’s their definition
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