What my friend taught me about kindness of this world

I have met many people who has supported and influenced me in my life journey. There are a lot of stories and memorable moments about them and with them. I know I won't be able to cover it all in this post.

So today I am going to share with you about a kind-hearted girl who accompanied me most of my time when we were both on our working holiday visas. Her name is Sabrina and I want to dedicate this post to her.

Before sharing with you the lessons I learned from Sabrina and how it has influenced my life, I think it is important to tell you how we met and eventually become close friends.

The first time we met was in Hastings, New Zealand in Jan 2017. We were there to work for a blueberry season. I still remember it was one day after work, Yellen - my Vietnamese girlfriend - told me that she and her flatmate would like to visit us.

My first impression about Sabrina was that she is a very friendly person, so easy to talk with which is a relief at that time. I just arrived in this new country for a month or so. It was difficult for me to communicate with my flatmates so I was always felt stressed when meeting a person who is not Vietnamese.

We visited each other places to have meals together a couple of times but that was it, we hadn't yet got close to each other. Until one day at the end of March, Yellen asked me to join a two-day trip to climb the Tongariro Crossing with them. Thanks to that hike, we had chances to share our stories and got to know more about each other.

^{My first one-day hiking trip in NZ with Sab}

When the blueberry season finished, we all decided to stay in Hastings for a bit longer and looked for jobs in apple packhouses. That was the time we spent our mornings, lunch breaks and afternoons together. It was so fun, lots of laughing, dancing and joking around.

^{Hooray, we finished packing apples earlier, let's head home}

^{Visiting a market fair after work}

^{We all dream about having long legs, here we go, so long}

^{We even woke up earlier at 5am on our day off to participate in an Anzac ceremony}

As winter was about to come, we need to make decisions about what to do and where to go next. I had been thinking about moving south to work for Hoki fish factories. However, one day Sabrina told me about an opportunity to work for a ski resort as a rental attendant. I could tell she was so excited about it. At that time, I had never seen snow in my life so the idea about working for a place like that and learning snowsports was amazing. I told Sabrina that I would love to join her.

We helped each other to prepare and apply for the job online. I was so thrilled when both of us got an invitation for interviews in Taupo, around four-hour driving from Hastings. We booked the interviews on a Saturday morning so we can spend the weekend away to explore Taupo and had some fun together.

^{Autumn in Taupo - the biggest lake in NZ and it is the same size as Singapore}

After 3 days, I got an email saying I was not chosen for the position as my visa only allowed me to work for 3 months and they prefer someone to be available for 6 months. I was gutted to tell Sab that I couldn't join her. We had been preparing for the interviews, I tried to do my best, searching about the company, their culture and learning online about rental attendants' responsibilities.

While I was preparing for another interview with one of the fish factories, I got an email from the manager of the Ruapehu Rental team offering me the job as one of the candidates refused to take it at the last minute. I couldn't believe it, so happy I contacted Sabrina right away to let her know I would be able to join her. We were both so thrilled about it.

^{Before leaving Hastings, Sab and I was invited to join a birthday party for a one-year old girl, which is a really important event for Kiribati people.}

Now I can share with you what I have learned from my friend.

Sabrina and I stayed in a ski lodge in the National Park Village. We lived in the same room with 6-bunk beds, we worked together in the same team so technically we spent a lot of time. And that was when I started learning many valuable lessons from her.

~~~The first one is always asking questions if you are curious or want to know more~~~

I am afraid of asking questions. I remember when I was in primary school, there was a classmate that always questioned our teachers. I am not sure if the teachers were not happy with him but they always told him off and asked him to think twice before asking these silly questions.

After that, I always asked myself: Is it a good question to ask? Are people going to say I am dump when asking questions? what a good question to ask anyway? By the time I could stop my chatter thought, I was convinced that it is better not to ask anything.

I remember it was our first day at the ski resort. We hadn't started working yet so Sabrina and I spent our afternoon going on a stroll around the village. We stopped in front of a nice house which displayed a notice for sale. Sabrina took out her phone and started making enquiries about the house: when it was built, how many bedrooms, heating system and pricing.

^{A cafe not far from the house that Sab made enquiries about}

I was so surprised she did that. Waiting patiently for her to finish the call, I asked why she called the property agent and if she would like to buy that property. She just told me: I was just curious about that nice house and want to know more. Just simple like that.

At that exact moment, I realise that Sabrina just taught me a valuable lesson. I had been thinking too much when asking questions. I had beaten myself up for questions that I haven't asked and called myself stupid before even doing so. I lost my ability to question simple things. What Sabrina did back then changed my perspectives about making questions. There is no need to worry about what others think about it, if I don't understand or am curious about something, just ask.

~~~We are chosen to come to this world to learn our lessons so no need to be afraid of taking up something news~~~

I had already been in NZ for more than 6 months so it is time for me to get ready for a plan to either stay longer for studying or go back home. I thought about studying but am not sure about it yet. I was still in between thoughts of what would be the best for me. At some points, I told myself to look for jobs in the hospitality industry so I could get a work visa to stay for longer. That way, I can save up more money. I was not happy with that thought but it seems like the safest option I have.

Thankfully, by seeing Sabrina spending her day off to solve tasks for assignments, I remember I was like her before, spending a lot of time figuring out answers for math lessons when I was in high school. I enjoyed it a lot back then. I used my whole afternoon calculating and making changes to a formula so I can get a correct answer for my homework. The moment I got it right, nothing can compare to that. A feeling that I can do it, if I spend time and put effort, I will get it right. It is so fun to study and learn my lesson. So I decided let's free up my calendar next year for studying, even I hadn't got enough money for studying yet but I know I could figure it out later.

~~~Words can hurt badly, even I didn't mean it~~~

I admire how Sab can communicate with friends from different countries using different languages and how she understands cultures from both the western and eastern worlds. I hadn't lived in a multi-culture environment before so I didn't know some of the words that I used can be considered rude.

There was a time when the way I used my words hurt her feelings. We wanted to throw a birthday dinner get-together for a friend and we couldn't agree on an arrangement. I was stubborn and didn't agree with her suggestions. I thought if we take up my suggestion, it would be better for all of us.

It was the first time I saw Sab lose her patience. After a day or so, we both wanted to talk and we tried to explain how we feel and what we want to do for our friends. We understand we misunderstood each other and the language gap made it even more difficult.

Thanks to this, I learnt my lesson and always think twice with my words so it won't hurt people I love by mistakes.

^{Dinner with our friends with our home-made sushi}

~~~Be kind and take care of people~~~

Working along with Sabrina in the same team, I witnessed every day how she helped our customers. How kind and friendly she is with people around her. I always appreciate that Sab asked me to join her journey and helped me to achieve that. She introduced me to her family and asked me to join them when they visited her in the mountain.

^{Our induction day at the ski resort}

^{Look for the gate of Modor}

^{Finished a busy day at work and waiting for our ride back home}

^{Our first skiing lesson at Happy Valley}

^{Meeting Sabrina's family}

I feel her kindness deeply when I got into a skiing accident on the top mountain. She was the first one running to the clinic to hug me and check up on me. She offered to give me a ride to see a doctor and helped me to arrange for a specialist when I was not able to do so.

The public health system in NZ has been in crisis for quite long. They don't have enough facilities and people to run it. At the time of my accident - Aug 2017 - as soon as I know I needed an ACL reconstruction operation, I wanted to arrange for it asap. However, I had to wait at least 1 month to just see a specialist who could decide on my operation. Then I probably had to wait for another month with examination and scan before he decided what to do next.

Who knows how long I would have to wait to get my operation. I didn't have much time left as my visa expried in less than 3 months so I need to act as soon as possible. Sabrina understood my difficulty so she researched online and looked for options in a bigger city. She read reviews from people and made phone calls to ask them how to get a referral for me. Without her support, I didn't know what to do. I didn't have my family around. I was not able to walk probably. I was miserable.

On the day I moved to a bigger city to see the specialist, Sabrina and another girlfriend of mine were willing to take their time off work and drove 5 hours to get me there, accompany me to the doctor and then say good luck for my journey.

At the moment, Sabrina is back in her hometown and I am still here in NZ. I miss her and my friends a lot. We had so much fun back then. We help and support each other as a family. We still keep in touch now and then to update about our lives. I hope we will see each other again one day soon.

Even though I said "thank you" to Sabrina many times but I still feel it is not enough for what she did. It was so kind of her to help a stranger like me. To my special girl, thank you so much for helping me to see the kindness of this world we live in, thank you for showing me how to treat people without asking anything in return, and thank you for being an inspiration for me to strive for a better future. Love you my friend.

Hive viet badge (1).png

^{Designed with Canva}

	Hive Power Up Month - Feedback from Day 29
	Hive Power Up Day - December 1st 2021 - Become an Orca!