How did you get your kid to listen to you during study time?
I've been asked this question a lot by moms in our neighborhood. Whenever they find out that we are homeschooling, they start telling me their horror stories about teaching time with their kids. I am no stranger to the horrors though. My mom taught us very sternly too. Back in the day, whenever it's reading time for my brothers and sister, my mom would hold a clothes hanger on one hand while they are reading a book at the dining table. My sister has the same practice. I, on the other hand, don't want to use violence as a motivator.
Teaching a toddler is an extremely challenging task that will test your patience and commitment. There are parents that started out homeschooling but ended up enrolling their kid in a regular school. There's nothing wrong with that. Of course, we should choose whatever is giving us peace and happiness while still giving our children the best education. This, however, is an experience I want to avoid. This is why I came up with a few things to help make study time an enjoyable activity, not a boring task that we just need to complete.
Establish rules
On our first week with our curriculum, one of our first lessons is about rules. It is important that the kid understands what the word rules means and why they are set. To make it easy for her to understand, the definition I gave her is that rules are a set of instructions that help keep the order in the house during study time.
Rules are a set of instructions that help keep the order.
We have made 5 major rules in our homeschooling. When we made these rules, we discussed the importance of following each. During the discussion, I let her ask questions, and I asked her to recap what she understood. At the start of our lessons every day, we read the rules just to refresh her memory. It's not as in-depth as the first time we discussed it but I let her just say what's on her mind and how she feels about each rule.
- Listen.
We agreed that this is one of the most important part of a conversation. This was the part where we explained to her that she should not just hear the words we say, she should also make sure that she understands what is being said. - Speak up.
A conversation is not complete if there's only one speaker. This is also a perfect opportunity to encourage her to tell us how she feels. There are instances when she wants to play first before we study. I also encourage her to tell me whenever there's a topic she doesn't understand. We also inspire her to use words to describe how she feels. I asked help from @marieeedraws to make us these emojis to train her how to let us know how she feels. I printed these out and she can use a decorative wooden peg to indicate how she feels for the day.
- There's a time for everything.
This does not necessarily mean that we stick to the schedule we created. We try to be flexible with our schedules as much as we can. I just noticed that her brain mapping seems to be a bit too diverse and she tries to discuss everything all at the same time. This is simply a task for her to focus on one thing so we can accomplish many things. This rule is also useful for taking turns in speaking and listening. It has also helped me with our sleeping time, eating time, bath time, and all other tasks that she wants to forego. - Be respectful.
This is one rule that we have to always elaborate and explain. Sometimes my kid forgets to show respect especially when she feels frustrated. I understand it though, being older doesn't necessarily mean you're always right but we teach her to approach and correct grownups in a respectful way as best as she can. - Have fun.
While it is important to learn new things, it is equally important that we have fun in the process. It is easier to teach and learn when we are both having fun. I remember feeling the fear when my parents taught me and my siblings back in the day. While the reading time for me was an enjoyable time, history and social studies were my weak points. That's where my parents used fear as my motivator. It was not fun. I find that a happy kid can easily absorb information more than a terrified kid.
Take note also that these rules also apply to the grownups at home. It is easier to impose rules when everybody is observing said rules.
Breakdown the tasks
We had a lesson about jobs in our first week in the curriculum. We discussed the tasks that each job has like a police officer, firefighter, hairdresser, and garbage collector. She even included what her Tatay does and what I do. It was actually touching how she enumerated what we do all day. This lesson made me realize that kids do see everything we do. It feels good to be appreciated especially by this little human.
Let them participate in thinking of the tasks
As a part of that lesson, we discussed that everyone has a job to do in the house. I let her enumerate the different tasks she does at home. She came up with a lot, apparently. According to her, these are her tasks:
- study
- play
- watch
- clean up
- eat
- take a bath
- read
- write
- sing and dance
- water plants
- sleep
- brush teeth
- exercise
- go to the potty
We had these tasks posted on her board so she can easily see them every day. So far, this jobs table has made our everyday tasks easier.
Create a routine
A habit takes 21 days to form.
I'm not sure if this is true but I heard this from my boss at my previous job. I was making a study for my Six Sigma certification about lessening the costs at that time that required a change in the process. We needed to create a routine for a test group for 3 weeks to see if it is possible.
We have now spent more than 3 weeks since we started this routine. We are trying to be consistent with our schedule: We wake up, we go up to the rooftop to enjoy some morning sun and water the plants, then we go ahead and start our lesson for the day with a 10-minute exercise. When we did not have a curriculum yet, we just go ahead and start reading and writing, then color some books, count, then do some science experiments.
Right now, our routine has had some new additions, like reviews and more activities and games. As much as we want to be consistent, we also see to it that we are also flexible with our schedule. It's technically not a schedule, but a checklist that we tick boxes on to finish our daily tasks.
Gamify
Nothing gives more encouragement and motivation than gamifying a lesson. For our lesson about parts of the face, we played a little game called Pin the tail on the donkey with a twist. I printed a face with no eyes, nose, and lips and I had her blindfolded then have her pin the parts on the face. Even her father joined the game too. It's a perfect opportunity to explain the importance of every part of the body.
She already knows the parts of the body by heart but right now, we need to make sure she knows how to read the words. So I made flashcards with the picture of the body parts and another set with the words. We played the memory game where the cards were placed face down then she would open 2 cards at a time. If the picture and the words match, she can keep the cards open. If it doesn't, she will have to turn it face down again. It's a good test of memory and practice for her reading.
Play with Colors
Toddlers get attracted by colors. The more colorful the picture, the more they get interested. So I bought a lot of colored paper, colored popsicle sticks, cartolina, and colored folders. Almost every night, I have a project, sticking pieces of paper to colored papers just to make our lesson more enticing. Make use of crayons, colored pens, colored markers, etc. Just be careful though of overdoing it. Too much color sometimes makes the little kiddo a little bit distracted. We're trying to teach how to focus while still making studying and learning fun.
Give the feeling of accomplishment
Kids love the good feeling of completing a task and having those recognized by grownups around them. That's why they always show what they did after they've been quiet for a while. It is our task as grownups to give them the recognition they so crave for. It gives them encouragement and a sense of fulfillment. It's not that hard to give those simple pats on the back to a toddler. After all, who wouldn't go Aww, that's so cute to a 3-year-old's drawing of a family.
Be wary though and be mindful if you're already giving too much Good job! and Wow! to your kid. Parents could sometimes go overboard with this. Parents tend to believe that our kid could be the next best artist, or singer, or dancer. And it's not a bad thing. Just try to regulate this. Recognize a kid's potential and work with whatever talent they naturally have.
Be quick in recognizing teaching points
Learning and teaching is a 24/7 task. A simple conversation with another person is a teaching point. A reaction to something they saw or heard could also be a good teaching point. Kids are human beings that are new to earth and everything needs to be taught to them. This is why it is important for everyone around them to be conscious about what they say and do because kids do what kids see, and kids say what kids hear. Homeschooling is a perfect avenue to impart the values you hold important to your kid. You have every chance you need to influence them into holding those same values important too.
If you are a grammar nazi, I encourage you to be around children who are learning how to compose sentences. You will get the fulfillment of correcting wrong grammar without getting bashed for being a know-it-all. I enjoy being a grammar nazi to my kid right now, I have a good dose of grammars to correct at home. It's beneficial both for me and for her. Win-win!
In conclusion
It is not easy to homeschool a kid. Even with all the online help you see, the differences between each kid make it almost impossible to come up with a unique style and technique in keeping them motivated. Each child is different that's why there is no singular sure way to keep the motivation going. The only sure way is to listen to your kid, and see what makes them stick to the process. Change up as much as necessary, but be consistent. But most of all, be patient and have fun through it all. If all else fails, just grab a cup of coffee, keep calm, and homeschool on!
@romeskie is a full-time stay-at-home mom to a homeschooling toddler. Loves crocheting as a hobby. Maintains a mini food forest, aiming to grow more to achieve that farm-to-table homesteading. Learned how to cook after leaving the corporate world to take care of her family and is now starting to acquire basic baking skills. Learn more about her adventures and misadventures in the world of motherhood.
Connect with her through her Facebook Page: The Leftie Crocheter and on Instagram. Feel free to subscribe to her Youtube Channel: The Leftie Crocheter
That 21 day thing has not worked for me ever XD
Those first items in the daily routine sound like a great way to start a day. They'll probably be among her favourite childhood experiences to share with any kids/grandkids that may eventuate otherwise just friends when everyone is old enough to be nostalgic.
I think your approach with the rules is a good one (and not just because I used something similar ;D). Nice and simple and flexible.
Seriously your mum stood over you with a coathanger O_O aaaaahhhhh well I guess at least it wasn't a feather duster, that was what happened to my sibling and I whenever we misbehaved x_x
Those emoji are adorable xD
And super cute of her to recognise and write down your jobs as well, see some people know just how important our jobs are even if wider society doesn't always recognise it ;D
I'm guessing from how you describe your homeschooling life and from the rules that you've set that you speak kindly and respectfully to her most of the time so I don't think you'll have too much to worry about when she's correcting adults as for the most parts I've noticed that kids do seem to model their speech patterns off whoever they're spending most time with :)
Honestly, that project I had at the office was the only one time that 21 day thing worked for me. Lol!
She's enjoying the routine so far but I'm sure it won't be long before I have to change it up again.
My mum had to teach all four children after school, so I can understand how she felt the need to use slightly extreme measures. Haha.
Yes, I try to be as kind as possible. However, there are instances when I'm all exhausted and I give her one word answers. I think she notices it and stops for a bit to give me a big hug. That often works to give me some sort of a boost throughout the day.
I have three two years apart and didn't need to resort to that XD
though youngest came close quite a few times before we found out it was adhd, he's a lot of hard work
Aww what a gorgeous child ^_^
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!ENGAGE 25
ENGAGEtoday.Hello certainly homeschooling involves the organization of our time in conjunction with our daily routine, it is not an easy job but as we develop them establishing certain parameters as you have done everything can be carried out satisfactorily, there are days that require more of us and our children by the content to be learned and the learning we want to give but certainly there is nothing better than being part of the cognitive development of our children, currently growing in number the number of parents committed to homeschooling. The pandemic has served to demonstrate to those who did not bet on the academic training of children and young people from home to demonstrate the benefits of knowing our children from the intellectual and develop their abilities, skills and abilities, we have had to learn with them and develop the pedagogy that many of us did not have. It is truly incredible to see your experience and that of everyone in the @homeedders community, this community is changing the way of thinking of many people who read our experiences of homeschooling and family life. Thank you for sharing
Very nice post! Thank you for sharing this, as some days I'm struggling a bit to motivate my daughter without ending up doing an art class lol.. I mean, I can always motivate her to paint/draw something together, but I think the setting of rules, in a clear way are a good thing to implement. Thanks for the inspiration :)
21 days to form a habit! Yes, but I'm not sure I've completed one ever (at least consciously, hehe)
Mukhang enjoy na enjoy naman si Aya sa mga activities nya. I think it's really important that our learners have fun while learning para hindi mabagot. Napansin ko yan sa kids ko, once na we settle for a desk set-up naku, nag-uumpisa pa lang naghihikab na. Haha. So I really need to find ways to make it enjoyable for them. Basta anything fun that we can still incorporate the lessons.
Naubusan ako ng activities one time, nagtry ako mag desk set up, the usual 2 hours lasted for only 45 minutes. She kept on asking what are we gonna do for the day. Like naghahanap talaga siya ng activities and games. Haha. Nasanay na. Good luck sa atin sa pag iisip at paghahanap ng aktibidades ng bagets. haha
Oo ganyan din Yung babae ko. "What are we going to do today?" haha
Mahaba pa yang 45 mins mo sa desk set up to think na 4 years old pa Lang ba si Aya?
Yep. Turning 5 siya this August. Nataon lang din Kasi na mahilig talaga siya magbasa. But after ng reading materials niya, kailangan talaga may back up na activities.
wow ate rome, organize na organize talga, madidisciplina tlga ang bata pag ganito, i can't imagine myself coming up this kind of strategy if i become a mom someday, while i was reading i was like "ohh may ganito pala"
hahaha tsaka ang enjoy naman ng gamify, baka try ko din sa mga little cousins ko dito sa bahay
🥰🥰🥰
Jan kami sa games madalas nagtatagal. Haha. Sometimes the games are related to the topic, sometimes hindi. Basta kailangan may giggles and laughter para mas magaang ang loob ni kiddo sa pag aaral. :)
hahah i feel the enjoyment tlga, ill keep this in mind 🥰
💚
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When you started with "rules" I thought it seemed a bit strict, but they actually make a lot of sense. I guess our own experience of much stricter rules which never seemed fair or were never explained can give us bad vibes when we hear the word. It songs like your little one is getting some great foundations.
I have always been curious back in my younger years and my why's were answered with "just because" which was very challenging. I encourage my kid to always ask and question everything that she don't understand. Sometimes she asks questions that are really challenging to answer but we try our best to explain.
Hi mam @romeskie how are you? I love the way you set rules with your daughter when it comes to learning. I can see how responsive she is, that simply means that your way of teaching is effective. Your daughter is lucky to have a mother like you who values education so well. Keep it up and Aya as well. Hope I can have my own soon at the perfect time to make my home more fun and enjoyable. Have a great Thursday.:-)
I am so glad that she became comfortable in voicing out her opinions. It makes teaching and learning a lot easier.
Yours will come in due time. I waited a bit long for my Aya to come into our life. And I am telling you, it is worth all the wait. 🥰
Thank you for encouraging me. Hopefully :-)
I think you have summarized some of the steps of homeschooling very well. I think the way you plan and execute the learning process is very important. There are people who believe that if you educate at home your child will not have a formation with rules and norms, which is not true, in homeschooling sometimes we have to establish more rules or norms to achieve the objectives. Really very good advice.
Thank you. There are indeed a lot of opinions against homeschooling but it's alright, all parents just mean well for their kids.
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