its been an ongoing thought, plaguing me for many years.
its just that, without my rock to keep me grounded ( mother ) i...
i just dont see the point of trying anymore.
sure, a lot of people would be at my funeral, but why would it take my death for people to finally come and see me?
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I wonder... what would you rock, your mother, tell you during this time? What wisdom would she impart your way in this situation? One thing I'm sure that she would not tell you is that there is only one way out...
Let her continue being your rock. Think what she would advise.
Yes, I do agree that people have this tendency to congregate over someone (or something) when they're already long gone. It's a last attempt to grab onto something when it's already left. Human nature is quite silly at times, can't deny this.
I think in situations like ours (I also experience a deep sense of loneliness at times), we can't really rely on others to come to us. We have to be the ones who initiate and maintain contacts. There's also a tendency for people to gravitate towards us when we consistently reach out to them (albeit, not to a point of being clingy or needy). If our own efforts are denied, then they're not worth our time. If they reciprocate, then that's the foundation for a friendship.