A Grave Affair

in #life3 years ago

IMG-PHOTO-ART-2117174341.jpg

Are you sure about this?

I asked the Good Lady as I peered up at the purple-black clouds above our house from the front doorstep.

Yes, Daddy-Bear. We always go for a walk on a Sunday. Are you hungover again? Is that why you don't want to go?

The Good Lady frowned and attempted to peek at my eyes which were sheltering under my beaten down brows.

I turned away. Hungover? Cheeky boot. I mean I was but that didn't mean she could go around making assumptions. What if I hadn't been hungover? Ha, that would have been a smear on my good name.

I made a low growling noise in my throat, like an impotent beaver being asked if it has any wood.

It looks as if it's going to piss down with rain.

Try as I might, I couldn't help but sound like an old shoe being filled with pickled onions.

The Good Lady laughed and pinched my cheek, joggling it and my jowels back and forth.

Oh Daddy-Waaddy-woo, you're not made of sugar you know. You won't melt!

Chortling, she turned and started sorting out the millions of things that we would need for a journey that involved two children and outside.

In no time at all, we were laden down with bags, snacks and water the likes of which would have shamed an 18th-century explorer into feeling they were underprepared.

As we left the house, it started to rain.

Soon we were in one of the local wild places.

Gradually with all the fresh air my head stopped pounding and settled into a dull ache. This wasn't so bad I suppose.

Daddy, look! What's through here?

20210328_105948-01.jpg

The Little Lady was pointing at a gap in the trees in which three gravestones stood guard.

My balls gave a little twinge with fear.

I didn't like the look of this. Not one tiny bit.

Yeah, come away, lass. We don't want to go traipsing in someone's graveyard. What if there were native Americans buried there or something?

It was a slim possibility, this being the grim and wet middle bit of Scotland but well, I had seen too many scary movies to not at least consider it.

Oh, Daddy-Bear. You're not scared of a little gravey-wavey-yard are you?

The Good Lady pinched my cheek in what was becoming quite an irritating way.

Yeah, Daddy. Come on!

The Booms all ran through the gap and into almost certain death.

Sighing, I followed. As I walked past the Gravestones I heard a low echoing clang as if a giant stone door had just crashed shut.

Spooked somewhat, I hurried after the family. The rain started coming down in sheets.

I passed all manner of twisted and lichen crusted headstones.

20210328_110046-01.jpg

20210328_110158-01.jpeg

They seemed to leer out at me as I scurried past trying to catch up with my family who were now nowhere to be seen.

20210328_111341-01.jpg

A needle loomed ahead, piercing the sullen sky.

20210328_110645-01.jpg

As I hurried, crow-like things screeched from the sides of my vision.

There! There was the Little Boom, he was standing in front of an ancient and terrifying stone deity.

20210328_111527-01.jpg

Little guy, over here!

I cried out.

He turned toward me but as he did a darkness enveloped us. Suddenly he was gone and I found myself alone under an alien sky in the blackness of a graveyard for things that were not human but hungered for what we had.

1616948229-picsay_20210328182407059_20210328235936769.jpg

Claws that stank of death clutched at me and I dropped to my knees screaming.


And that is probably why we shouldn't go out?

I said hopefully to the Good Lady as we stood on the front doorstep, my cheek still aching from where she had pinched it.

Oh, Daddy-bear. What an imagination. You're still a dick when you're hungover though.

Chortling, she turned and started sorting out the millions of things that we would need for a journey that involved two children and outside.

As we left the house, it started to rain.

Sort:  

Yeah, ok.. Raining in Scotland. As if.

Damn, caught out in a barefaced lie!! :0D

When I take a walk through the woods for 30 minutes, it's just a peaceful walk and with a little bit of luck I would see some deers or wild turkey. Now..., with your "IMAGINATION", my 30 minutes walk through the woods would be completely different. I dont even know if i could get back alive. Wild turkey would turn in to a werewolf, deer into a bigfoot.... And perhaps at the end of my walk right before my dorsteps happy to survive I would be abducted by aliens.
If you dont mind would you tell me what you see with your imagination? I took this picture of nature when I was on my walk for 30 minutes.

bigfoot1.JPG

What in the name of heck!! My old cat that went missing! You've found him! :OD

He does look a little more womanly than he did before. I hope he hasn't fallen in with the wrong crowd...

!WINE

:OD

I wish i had your imagination. All I see is woods and trees lol. Perhaps you went missing and your old cat is safe and sound home.

Wait!! Perhaps my old cat is safe and sound at home but what if I am my old cat. Them who is me? Aaaaargh!?

Im puzzled, sounds to me like you are sound and safe home. But if you are sound and safe home, than who the womenly figure is you see on the picture I took on my 30 minutes walk?

There must be a doppleganger!!

I will find this person wearing my skin and skin them alive!

You get !WINE for the picture of the little Boom. That's a gallery worthy photo!!!

My Grandfather used to manage his local cemetery. (Arranged for the graves to be dug, lawns to be mowed, lanes to be kept clear, etc etc). He used to absolutely love it when a family came to pay respects and the kids ran around playing on and amongst the stones. He assured anyone that asked that all of the permanent residents loved every minute of the child play!.


Congratulations, @gikitiki You Successfully Shared 0.100 WINE With @meesterboom.
You Earned 0.100 WINE As Curation Reward.
You Utilized 1/1 Successful Calls.

wine-greeting
Total Purchase : 24816.918 WINE & Last Price : 0.290 HIVE
HURRY UP & GET YOUR SPOT IN WINE INITIAL TOKEN OFFERING -ITO-


WINE Current Market Price : 0.270 HIVE

That is good to know. I think it is nice to have the place have a bit of life and laughter about it.

I was super impressed when he stood there, I was like don't move!!!

If you'd spent less time watching where you're going and taking photos of random graves you might not have lost track of where they'd gone and might have noticed the eldritch portal into some other dimension before stepping through it ;D

Do you actually have a graveyard in the middle of the wilderness walking distance from where you live?

We do!! I was quite astonished myself. My daughter found it. She was like, daddy look at this same I was like what the fuck!? It is quite old and disused, all the graves were still the very early 1900s. It backs onto a sort of ravine. Normally we potter about at the bottom of the ravine at the river and I did always wonder what was up top. Some of the statues were pretty awesome!

I didn't even know this park was there until lockdown. Ten minutes walk away too!

Ooh a really old probably disused one, is it on a map? Back home there's a couple of old disused graveyards that I think may be on maps now but at one stage you just had to know where they were (or stumble across them and be surprised XD though this only really mattered if you were doing historical research or were very superstitious, for example my mum, sister and I refuse to pick chillies from one of the old disused Chinese cemeteries but JJ would have no qualms whatsoever and given the shenanigans my dad got up to in his youth I don't think he would either). And now you know what's on top of the ravine :D

Are your kids the type that really like looking over edges? I'm kind of surprised you didn't just pop up to the top of the ravine on one of your treks there if you were wondering what was up top.

Apparently lockdown is when people find all the cool nearby things. There's a large regional park a short drive from where we live and we used to be able to go there even on weekends and there would only be a literal handful or less of people there. After stupid virus, we traipsed over there one time to test out a new camera or lens or something that JJ had recently purchased and it was so impossibly packed out (carpark overflowing wtf that has never happened before) we thought there must be some kind of event on so we went further up the road to another part that was still busy but not as crazy (carpark still full but spots available).

Went up the following weekend to the same thing and then realised that "everyone" had newly discovered this gem on their back door after only being "allowed" out a short distance so figured we've lost that spot for the foreseeable future if we wanted a nice quiet hike XD

It's on a map! I checked. Although it is massive so I think we must have been at the disused end. It was all overgrown and the graves were all from the first world war type of time. The ikds got spooked so we couldn't investigate the whole thing. The demonic angel statue was the last straw for the little lady :OD

It's a massive ravine, to get to the top from the bottom would have been a ropes and climbing affair. Although it is quite comical because you don't notice you are descending into it until you are in.

This park suffers a bit from the everyone discovering it because of stupid lockdown syndrome. It can get quite busy so we go super early.

My kids do suffer from the looking over the edge thing. With the wee guy it was more nerve wracking because he is only three and didn't quite get the, you can Plummer to certain doom kind of thing!

!WINE


Congratulations, @meesterboom You Successfully Shared 0.100 WINE With @ryivhnn.
You Earned 0.100 WINE As Curation Reward.
You Utilized 1/3 Successful Calls.

wine-greeting
Total Purchase : 24816.918 WINE & Last Price : 0.290 HIVE
HURRY UP & GET YOUR SPOT IN WINE INITIAL TOKEN OFFERING -ITO-


WINE Current Market Price : 0.270 HIVE

Is little guy the type that looks over, decides it looks kinda high and then decides to try anyway? That was youngest for way too long x_x

Yep, looks over, sways in the wind, takes another tiny step closer looks over more, wobbles, takes another tiny step closer...

The goes nuts when you call him away!

That was exactly my youngest! I reckon it's shaved years off my life x_x LoL XD

Loved it :D

That photo of your lad, hood up and starring at the creepiest gravestone ever, creepy!!

See when he was doing it, he was giggling and I was like, fark me, that's an awesome shot. Please stay still!!!!!

It is a cracker.

I guess the owner/relatives of that gravestone paid some mean dollar back in the day. Not sure they were expecting a child to be amused! :D

It did feel a tad disrespectful at times!! It must have cost a fortune. Close up it was totally impressive, big winged angel but now with the passing of time and the odd broken limb it looks like a devil!

and pinched my cheek, joggling it and my jowels back and forth.

You know, @bingbabe does this all the time. Do your jowels fart when she does it?

They can do. My missus loves doing it but I do swear, lately the pinching and joggling seems a bit harder! I wonder if she is trying to tell be something!

Yeah, she seems to think it's amusing.. at my cost!

They won't think it's amusing when we have big saggy jowls like Droopy!

Mine are already coming on nicely. I need one of those facelift thingies.

Perhaps we should grow our hair and tie it back really tightly 🤣🤣

I've been a fan of your work for a very long time, sir. Even tried to tell you your beer videos would make you famous because I'm right and every brewery in the land would be kissing your ass and offering a constant supply of samplings.

This post was pretty cool, too.

You are a champion yourself dude! Cheers!

Which reminds me, I really need to get my arse in gear and try to get the beer posts going again!!

Sticking to your brand and managing to keep it fresh at the same time, for a long time. Well done. I'm impressed. Is that too many compliments? Is this awkward now? Am I doing that on purpose? No. Of course not! You deserve more praise and the highest of all high fives.

NoNamesLeftToUse - High Five.jpeg

I believe that to be the highest of high fives. It is the highest achievement a man can aspire to.

Should we hold hands after the five? :0D

Hold hands? Well I guess if you wanted to help me carry them over to the wood chipper, that'd be fine.
NoNamesLeftToUse - This Won't Hurt.jpeg

Yeah, that would be a great help. I tried burning them but they just wouldn't catch!?

Well at least now they'll come in handy.

I love it when it rains because it doesn't happen often. Scottish people are probably fed up with it lol.
I think you can grow dimples if you get pinched so many times like you were lol
The last picture is quite artistic lol, I like it. I am a big fan of purple and blue

I love all manner of digital footery but yes, I am as particular fan of those colours too!

We are totally fed up with the rain is almost constant except for three months of 'summer' :0/

Ouch, so much humidity 😱

Everything is covered in moss!

Great photography! One point though, Native Americans are white people who pretend to be "part Indian." My Indian friends all prefer to be called American Indians, not to be confused with Liberals.

Lol. Dammit, I knew I wait getting the terms right!! Bloody liberals!! :0F

Those old monuments are really cool -- memento mori -- having managed 3 cemeteries for 10 years I became something of an expert. The cross made of logs, for example, is almost exclusively a signature of Woodsmen of the World. BTW, your countryman Paul McCartney is indeed dead.

Q004436-R1-09-9.jpg

I wondered about the cross made of logs, there were a couple and they definitely stood out!

No loss on the McCArtney front. After all, he did write the Frog song :OD

Well the only good things is when they get older the tables turn. When we go hiking, I laden down my son with so much camera gear that he bought a special backpack just to carry it! I put my water bottle and phone in there as well. No mercy and no quarter given...

Id say you go maybe a 15 year wait or so. Goes by in a blink :)

The funny thing is, Ican really imagine it going by in a blink. The past eight years for the little lady seem to have. I mean, she is only a bit away from being a teenager!

She will be getting laden down!

Menakutkan

I am going to shoot this post on Twitter sorry =) I think it's a great tool ;)

Lol. Don't be sorry! Cheers!!

!WINE

Ahahah...

My feedback flows using !BEER and !WINE too... but ultimately also using !ENGANGE techniques that make people go crazy supportive.

I was already following you, but there is too much great work on this blockchain that I forget to check everyone regularly...

You are really good. Really enjoy your stuff mate. Keep this. You have a good attitude!

I quite often use the engage and beer ones too! Wine is my new one!

Cheers, that's very nice of you to say!

!BEER


Hey @forykw, here is a little bit of BEER from @meesterboom for you. Enjoy it!

Learn how to earn FREE BEER each day by staking your BEER.


Cheers @forykw, Thank You For Inviting @meesterboom To A Glass Of WINE.
At The Moment You Don't Have Enough WINE Staked To Order A Glass Of WINE From @wine.bot.
Please Refill Your Barrels By Directly Buying WINE From Marketplace & Make Sure You Have Atleast 25.00 WINE In Staked Wallet.

wine-greeting
Total Purchase : 24845.318 WINE & Last Price : 0.290 HIVE
HURRY UP & GET YOUR SPOT IN WINE INITIAL TOKEN OFFERING -ITO-


WINE Current Market Price : 0.270 HIVE


Hey @meesterboom, here is a little bit of BEER from @forykw for you. Enjoy it!

Learn how to earn FREE BEER each day by staking your BEER.


Hey @meesterboom, here is a little bit of BEER from @forykw for you. Enjoy it!

Learn how to earn FREE BEER each day by staking your BEER.


Congratulations, @meesterboom You Successfully Shared 0.100 WINE With @forykw.
You Earned 0.100 WINE As Curation Reward.
You Utilized 1/3 Successful Calls.

wine-greeting
Total Purchase : 24845.318 WINE & Last Price : 0.290 HIVE
HURRY UP & GET YOUR SPOT IN WINE INITIAL TOKEN OFFERING -ITO-


WINE Current Market Price : 0.270 HIVE

Ohhhhh! Deja-vu! You will live this scene over and over.

It's a loop!! I mean, I don't mind loops but how come there's always dying at the end!

I knew that. It bought me time. Sorry, mate. There is an end to everything, eventually. But, when you are writing the story, you are the boss.

Eternity for everyone.

Hurrah for eternity!!

It doesn't seem like it lasts for ever but it surely does.

How's that for philosophy!! Lol

Shocking that you have such a firm grasp of it. I hear some eternities are better than others.

I know for a fact some eternities are better than others. Some folk's eternities have white tulips!!! ;O)

Damn it I wanted to give a vote and just saw you have a $100 on this! What the hell happened? :)

I think the witnesses might have updated the price feed or something! Maybe they are catching up with the hive price movements? I noticed myself and almost fell off my chair. It's like the mad old days!

LOL! Nothing wrong with that.

Show the big lady how much people LOVE you!! :)

Hehe, that was one of the first things on my mind. She can understand that better than the farms and the cubs!!

just show 254 people loves you and gave you $100.... you should be good for several days...

Then of course the reality will kick in... as it always does!

It always does and does with a thump!! That's why you have to take the good times when you get them!

How can I buy a ticket on that train?

You don't buy trickers for this train baby. You just got to hold out your thumb and hope!

Thumbs up and a bottle of rum for my coke. It's all good, Boom! I actually am okay with earning my way.You have already earned your wings.

Time. I'll get there. :))

Hehe, oh that train. Lol, I don't even know we were talking about that one!! :0D

I don't even want to hear you utter what train you thought it was! LOL

Thanks for continuing to make Hive awesome.