All was quiet and still in the Beer Shop.
The Bear-Man lurked, as he usually did, behind the counter but today he was unusually silent.
The clink of a beer as I picked it up from the shelf echoed unnaturally loudly.
Almost guiltily I put it back.
The atmosphere was thick with tension like lady-custard left out in the sun.
I shuddered with an oddly powerful sense of dread.
I 'ave a powerful sense of dread.
Intoned the Bear-Man from behind me as if reading my thoughts.
You what?
I said, turning to face him.
He looked serious and almost frightened.
I 'ave a powerful sense of dread.
He repeated again with a little more urgency.
His eyes stared at me with an intensity not becoming of a Friday afternoon.
Why?
I half whispered as I looked around me for signs of danger. What could it be that would frighten a giant of a man like the Bear-Man??
The Four Horsemen an all.
Said the Bear-Man with a grim finality.
I reeled back slightly.
The Four Horsemen!? Was this the start of the apocalypse then?
But why!? Why here? Why now? Why Glasgow? Glasgow was a bit shit. Why would the Four Horsemen begin the apocalypse here?
When?
I asked timidly.
Did I have time to run home and tell my family I loved them? Maybe indulge in a final hand shandy? It would be unseemly to leave this mortal coil without at least one more in the bag.
Wait a minute... Wait a minute... For once, I reigned in my wild imagination. Come on. I didn't believe in all that nonsense. There was no such thing as the Four Horsemen.
The Bear-Man had obviously gone stir crazy. Who wouldn't, trapped in a shop full of exotic beers every day?
The door of the Beer Shop clattered open and a short, grizzled looking man in a suit came in.
He took a big deep breath.
Have you got a powerful sense of dread??
He asked his face lumpy with anguish like a dog reaching down to lick its testicles only to find that they are not there and instead there is only a line of crude stitches.
Aye.
Replied the Bear-Man grimly.
The man in the suit's eyes widened as if he could barely believe what he was hearing.
The Four Horsemen??
He asked hoarsely.
TheBear-Man inclined his head solemnly.
Aye.
Oh my God!? It was true?? It really was true!? I felt mybrown growler loosen involuntarily.
I let out a faint whinny of fear and desperation.
You want them as well?
Asked the Bear-Man pulling two can's of beer out from under the counter.
Wh.. what??
He pushed the cans towards me.
Chocolate Stout's!! A Powerful Sense Of Dread and the Four Horsemen. They look like a couple of beauties!
He exclaimed proudly as if he had birthed them out of some moist crevice he owned.
I looked at the beers in question.
Just beers.
No apocalypse.
I sighed with relief.
Aye, go on then.
U'll be drinking these in your next beer taste right? Raspberry taste again... the dreaded taste!
Lol, I will be!! I am still not keen on Raspberry but I can take things like that in a dark beer!!!
I hope! :0D
'No apocalypse.'
Wouldn't you rather wait saying this till after you drank 'em?
Hmm. Now that might be a good point! I shall reassess after the drinking!!!
There will be apocalypse!!!
Ahhh, they sound nice and hearty, here's hoping they bring no true apocalypse lol...I'm just not ready!!
I'm hoping they are hearty. Still feel cheated after last week's nonsense!!! Fingers crossed!
can't be worse than last week....can it????
One can only hope no!
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I feel like this is not the first time you've been tricked by the names of beers in this particular beer shop. Still, makes for a good story.
The names play havoc with my imagination. Who would call their beer such a thing!
Phewwwwww…!!!!!! You certainly had me going there once again with that powerful sense of dread rumbling within my lower abdomen Mr. Boom as a result of your twisted imagination...
My imagination is a twisted thing indeed!
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haha! howdy sir meesterboom, you never know what a trip to the Bear Man's store is going to be like!