Musings XIV

in #photography7 years ago (edited)

"I watch porn and there's nothing wrong with that."

Awkward situations are bound to happen when I walk into the room. The statement above left an acquaintance speechless at a party some years ago. She shouted passionately, telling the group that if she EVER caught her boyfriend watching porn then they would have to break up. It was obviously that she was out to embarrass her boyfriend with that nasty comment. Another friend stood behind her in support which riled up a few others. I threw a sympathetic glance towards her partner before interrupted her rant. 

If you're unable to keep up with your partner's drive, fulfill a fantasy or subdue their desire then why not let them do as they please? 

Some would argue that they're uncomfortable knowing that their partners are looking at another, but that happens on a daily basis. We're constantly looking at all genders and surrounding ourselves with others that we find attractive. It doesn't mean that we want to fuck them, we're simply wired this way.

Like most, I've had my fair share of shitty love affairs. 

I could infinitely roll my eyes at all the selfish lovers of my past and I'll continuously count my blessings for the amazing sex life that I have now. I'll also be honest in saying that I'll be keeping most of the dirty details locked away. I'm not shy but there are some things that I hold sacred. It most definitely is an Aquarius thing because I find that it's thrilling to have secrets only shared between lovers.

Sometimes I wonder...

I wonder if I'll ever be in a situation where I'm able to have a real conversation with all the people that feel the need to shame their partners. Is it insecurity that drives you? Sexual frustration? Fear of the unknown and hate for the unfamiliar? 

I'm closely connected with my girlfriends and we talking about this kind of stuff all the time. I'm into kinky things that they would never try and I'll question why they're doing something that I find ridiculous. No judgments, only laughs and answers that will leave you feeling like there is someone else out there that you can relate to. 

So from this female porn loving fox to you...

Remember to communicate, compromise, and maybe try spicing things up with a few love slaps. 🦊

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It's nice that the whole porno divide between men and women are cracking up - it is just part of a long tradition that states that women are less interested in sex than men, and that whole charade is being bombarded on us from puritan media all the time.

But the truth is that men and women are equally interested and that is why it is happening all the time.

So, I admire you, like I admire my female friends that openly go against the regime that wants women to be demure and boring... by just saying that they enjoy porno.

🙊🙉😃👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🍆🐳

There should be no shame in something almost everybody does, sometimes I wish the pretentious would just rub one out for themselves once in a while, get over the taboo.

We'd be left with very happy people.

I think one of the more poignant t-shirts I've seen read "You're someone's reason to masturbate." My friend Sparkle (real name-- she had hippie parents) used to wear it to parties as a "conversation starter" and was it ever.

What was interesting, though, was that it made so many people squirm uncomfortably... for so many reasons. And this was among grad school aged people...

What a fantastic name! That shirt sounds like the perfect ice-breaker. I would've laughed and instantly walk over to chat.

I only get mad when I can't join in the viewing fun haha.

It's the same feeling you'd get if they promise to watch the most recent release of GOT but then they watch without you.

Excellent photography.
Upvoted and Following you.
Please visit my profile, hope you enjoy my photography also and don't forget to follow and upvote me...@saan

Thanks. I'll be sure to check it out.

Porn lovers unite!
haha High five to you pretty lady for such a truthful post!

🙌🏼 Yay!!

100% if your partner cant satisfy you , you would deffo watch porn , i think its all a matter of perspective tho, some girls might get easyly jealous?and are trying everything they can to satisfy there partner, i dont kno..nearly all men are addicted to porn also which isnt healthy for some people.. doing a nofap at the moment and feeling better then ever, i would still ovbs have sex tho..Nice write up i think the best way is just to accept people who they are, try broaden there horizons but if there not willing to be open and have a generall conversation without there ego getting involved there is no point ,becasuse they will never change there minds..Thats my two cents .. peace

Thanks for leaving your thoughts. I agree that it really is a matter of perspective. I'm not saying that everyone has to watch porn but it helps in certain cases. I did know a guy that was addicted to porn so I've seen the bad side of it too. I do find that the next best thing to porn is to constantly flirt with your partner, that way things stay exciting.

100% you need to keep the relationship fresh and spicy, other wise it dies down, once many people get the girl/guythey give up and become complacent because they no longer have to put the work in ,as they did before to get into the partnership, becoming lazy , not striving for goals ect..

I'm gonna be the biggest flirt when I'm 90.

hahaha why not now?? no point waiting that long ;)

Oh, I am! I'm just gonna keep it up until then!

haha touche ;) have a good one !!

I don't like when people throw their significant other under the bus (as in your example) to me its a respect thing. Its one thing to have an argument etc with person you are in a relationship with, it is another to try and embarrass them for "points" in front of your friends.

If I was that guy I probably would have pulled some up on my phone right then lol

🤣 I wish he would have! They're actually not together anymore and I'm not curious enough to ask why.

If you like to watch porn especially with your man, there is nothing wrong it, but the attempt to shame your partner comes from insecurity. A lot of women don't want to have to compete with those onscreen and that's where the threats come from. That's why its important for couples to have similar interests all around.

"its important for couples to have similar interests all around."
Yep, I agree with you.

Nice vermillionfox. The Matrix loves it.

Thanks for stopping by!

Yes, we still live in a very conservative world...

Hai Iike , Nice Photo. Please your votes me.

Thanks. I'll check out your posts.

I don't watch porn, and I'll tell you what is wrong with it. Being aware, and being an empath, when it comes to porn, in my view it's nothing even remotely sexy. It's a drama. Lost people selling their body for money. Sex without feeling is not fulfilling, it's actually devoiding. Beyond that, when two people are really into eachother, they should explore their sexuality to the limit.
No energy like sexual energy, but harnessing it goes beyond the body, and true, deep feelings cannot be achieved through superficiality.
But that's just me

I agree with you, not all porn is good but there are other options of ethical porn. Any film directed by Erica Lust and any film by Four Chambers is created in a beautiful artistic way of self expression and acceptance. I also agree that 'when two people are really into each other, they should explore their sexuality to the limit' - but sometimes that's not in the cards. I have been in long term relationships where it was impossible to meet eye to eye with each others needs. It's unfortunate and I wish there was more trust there but that's how you end up with a life partner in the future. I also want to thank you for leaving a comment because I do respect your opinion.

I know what you mean about relationships where you can't really express your sexuality, because your lover brings her/his ego to bed. I know there's all sorts of porn, I'm not saying I never watched it lol. I stopped about 2 years ago, and don't miss it at all. Playing my own fantasies in my mind seems much healthier, but not everybody has such a colourfull imagination as mine :)
Thanks for your reply, I do admire your open mind, your bravery and your beauty ❤