The Difference Between Pain and Suffering

in Natural Medicine4 years ago (edited)

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Today, yesterday and most of the last two weeks while going through symptoms of coronavirus there have been two constants - extreme nausea and my internalized mind-made suffering from the symptoms attacking my system.

All of the other symptoms have been then gone, for which I am very thankful. But the nausea, stomach cramps, and other gut symptoms you don't want to know about, remain. Perhaps this is part of the recovery process, which I have read can take between a week and a month. Perhaps the virus lingers in the place where I am most weak, my gut.

To which I say "the gut is the second brain. If I can switch off the thoughts constructing the perception of suffering, I can breath through this point of attack."

This morning, despite extreme nausea, I completed three rounds of Wim Hof breathing with the final round holding my breath for one minute and fifty seconds. I drank a pint of water and then submerged myself in a freezing cold shower for forty seconds - I'm slowly building to the 2-3 minutes research has shown the Wim Hof technique activates the immune system's response. I then cycled to the allotment to water my tomato plants without eating, which I instinctively knew would destroy me for the day due to the nausea.

I then meditated in the park for nearly an hour. Sat by the big fountain in Sefton park watching and listening without judgement or evaluation.

The hoot of moorhen in the eves of hanging willow melded with the excited shouts of children playing in the sun. The ducks and geese seemed calm to my presence as they wandered past me only feet away. The nausea melted away in the timelessness of no thing, no thought. The best way I can describe it is to say I felt like I was the listening and the things I heard all at once.

No separation between myself and the ducks.

I was the warbling of the geese and the distant whisper of breeze over the crest of sycamore trees.

I have no pictures to share of today as I thought to take no pictures.

Below is a short film I made around a year ago called The Nature of Sefton Park. It's pretty sketchy, and represents one of my first attempts at video editing, but it was a sunny day and will give an impression of the park for those who are interested.

It was in this state of meditation, a deep state of separation from thought and ego that I haven't achieved in a while, that I had a realization.

Suffering is a reactive thought pattern in reaction to pain conditions. The suffering isn't rooted in reality, it is a construct of thought and therefore unnecessary.

This isn't to say the pain isn't real. I didn't eat today until I arrived home at around midday for a reason. I knew the nausea would ramp up and make me feel awful once I ate, and true to form it has, and I've been running back and forth to the toilet all day. But despite the pain/symptoms being the same, today is very different than yesterday in how I am dealing with it.

Yesterday was spent mainly trying to catch patches of sleep between meals, pacing around the apartment as my stomach did flip flops and living entirely in a thought induced state of resistance.

How do I make this stop.

When will this be over.

Why this shit again...

and on they can run with no seeming ending in sight. That is the suffering mind at its core. Constantly repeating pointless thoughts in a cycle.

This is different to my actions today, which have been to drink a lot more water (helped a little), try peppermint tea (hasn't helped) and vary my meal spacing (which has provided some small relief). The most important thing that has changed is how I relate to my pain, or in the case of today how I'm not relating to it at all. I am simply acting... trying different ways to ease the symptoms.

My mission for the next two weeks is to see if I can slip into the deep quietening of mind that I described earlier repeatedly, and separate what is happening to me from the reactive landscape constructed by thought patterns.

I may not write as much over the next few weeks. I may even disappear completely for a while. Healing is the most important thing, and I instinctively feel that this realization that I don't have to inhabit this pain in thought, is the first step on that path.

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Thanks so much for the curation bdcommunity 🌿

I do already vote bdcommunity as witness, but I'm not really interested in splinterlands tbh.

Just a writer, doing what I do 🙂

Thanks again for the curation, it is much appreciated!

As #posh as a bit of Basil on your cheese on toast!

 4 years ago  

TRhat's just standard at my place in Australia :P

 4 years ago  

internalized mind-made suffering

Worse, suffering that knows it's mind made suffering and getting pissed off at the mind for making the suffering in loops on loops

No separation between myself and the ducks.

I love this feeling so much. It's one of my favourite meditation things to happen. Oneness.

I hear you on the nausea. I know you suffer usually but since we've been in UK we've suffered a lot from stomach issues. Jamie has them anyway - but BOTH of us have had weird cramps and pains that have really floored us. It sucks when it's every day. I keep trying to not identify with the pain - but it's okay for me, I have some mind tools. Jamie doesn't always.

Hope the next few days ahve you experiencing small moments of ananda xx

Hi riverflows

suffering that knows it's mind made suffering and getting pissed off at the mind for making the suffering in loops on loops

I didn't want to mention that level, and let the demon out of the bag so to speak. I've spent years of my life in the past in that level of cyclic thinking/suffering. That is the mating hoot of the anxious/depressed mind... looking to constantly replicate its own suffering in an insane belief that its all that is real. When the exact opposite is the case. It is a terrible way to live, one of my friends is still at that level of depression and has been for over 10 years.

While I was writing this blog I was kinda swimming in and out of that ananda to try and reflect how it actually felt. Maybe someone will read the descriptions of the no thing-ness in the park and it act like a pointer for them.

I was tripped, or pointed, powerfully this morning by listening to Adyashanti talking about this stuff, just after I got out of the shower. That's when I entered that action state and just drank water, got on bike off I went to the allotment. Pure doing. When I was at the allotment watering the tomatoes was when it evolved into a connection or oneness with my environment. It was a beautiful morning!

Also, this Wim Hof cyclic breathing is as he puts it 'good stuff' 🤣

but since we've been in UK we've suffered a lot from stomach issues. Jamie has them anyway - but BOTH of us have had weird cramps and pains that have really floored us.

the UK is the worst for getting hold of decent un-processed foods etc. It is literally impossible for me to eat organic on my income and if you're living in the city supermarkets are your only option. It's my biggest gripe about the UK in relation to my condition, it is literally set up to get you to slip into unhealthy eating habits.

Anyway, hoping for easement of your odd symptoms and that it improves long term for Jamie 🌿

 4 years ago  

Yeah, I've never been happy with food living in England. Back in the early 2000's I lived here for 5 years and constantly complained about the food. And then I told Jamie about how great the food was in Oz - he didn't believe me until he got there.

And now he misses 'the food at home'.

But dang you guys eat fuckloads of potatoes. I even have some potato themed writing planned.

Do get well soon 😊😊

Suffering is a reactive thought pattern in reaction to pain conditions. The suffering isn't rooted in reality, it is a construct of thought and therefore unnecessary.



That's an incredibly powerful line. I suppose for most of us it's easier to say when the pain isn't within ourselves, but kudos to you for being able to realize it and work to internalize the concept. Really hope you're over the worst of it.

Yeah. It has helped me in the past making this distinction.

The trick is taking that realization and running with it. The personality and thought patterns of a whole life time of societal conditioning try to pull you back into the cyclic thinking when you're in pain. Today has been a struggle if I'm honest.

Anyway, even complaining about it on hive is playing into the hands of that compulsive thinking pattern... so I'm gonna stop 😉

Thanks for checking out my post, and following. I'll go check out your blog 👍

Day by day, it's all a work in progress. Hope today is better than the last!

I'm so glad you're on the mend. But oh, that nausea. It pains me how that haunts you. I'm very impressed with your method, and it really seems like you are onto something. Instead of fully embracing and being your pain and discomfort, you are distancing yourself and embracing breathing and living and settling your mind. I imagine that is a very powerful approach, and that the discipline required pays off well. And I do hope you are on a healing journey to improvement.

This is one of the most poetic lines I think I have every read in a piece of prose:

The hoot of moorhen in the eves of hanging willow melded with the excited shouts of children playing in the sun.

That's beautiful. I also enjoyed your video of the park.

Get well, you.

have you tried food grade organic bentonite clay and diatomaceous earth. Getting gut flora back to 80/20 ratio needed for great gut health? I did it and it helped regulate my bathroom habits. To be honest we have parasites inside. And women dealing with breast implant illness don't know it's but they have parasites as well. So when I have the breast implants removed I went on this stomach detox. The diatomaceous earth is like an exfoliate. Microscopic. It cuts up paradites, cleans small and large intestines, then the bentonite clay just helps smooth it all up. I did a regimen for like two months. It helped a lot. Do some research on it. It helped me. Im not sure what it can help for you but Just to add another note bentonite clays used by a lot of lupus patients because it helps pain. So just stuff i heard learned and used. Hope it helps. It ducks. Life, pain. I know it all too well. Just differently. Btw tweeted.

Wow, you are trying everything possible. I'm sorry your symptoms are so bad. Just know they won't last too long.

I wish you the best and sending positive vibes.😀

Our minds and stress can really do a number on us physically. Reducing negative thoughts, fear and stress can always improve our overall wellbeing.
Good luck fell better soon

 4 years ago  

Oh Rowan, I do hope you are feeling better now, you really are having a rough time of it. You have such a great attitude though, sending you healing and love xx