All things being considered, it was great until it wasn't. Like most people in the comedy community, I don't go on a lot of dates mostly because I'm what most people will call an introvert, I find my bed a better conversationist than most people.
Sure talking to my bed seems a bit crazy but it beats talking to humans and the best part is it never talks back when I yell at it.
I managed to pull myself together that evening because a guy invited me on a date and my brother was going to tell my parents I was a lesbian. I wore my clothes and headed to the park to see my date. It wasn't anything special, I just decided I needed to leave my safe space and the guy I was meeting wasn't that bad.
We met and we talked for a while. Hunger started to set in and he suggested we go to a nearby restaurant to eat and continue talking, the bill was on him. Normally I don't like eating outside but I was on a date, I needed to be on my best behavior.
He wasn't too short, let's just say my expectations were taller than him. We get to the restaurant and order for food while he talked about himself throughout. A clear indication of a red flag, not him but the guy holding up an arsenal flag behind him.
He finally let us have a normal conversation, that's when I realized he was a Chelsea fan and that was a big no for me. You can tell a lot about a guy's taste from his football club and Chelsea is better off as an alcohol drink if we're being honest.
After eating, the bill came and he didn't have enough cash to pay. The date was going bad already, I just wanted to get out of there. I offered to pay and he immediately agreed. I'm not saying that was bad but he could have at least hesitated a little to show he was concerned.
We left the restaurant and I immediately wanted to go home, he offered to walk me to the junction and I agreed, I was getting rid of him soon anyways.
Just before we get to the junction, he goes,
"I have a way to get your money back".
I asked him how and he pointed at a betting shop close by. I don't bet so I knew nothing about it but he sounded confident, plus, he wasn't going to use his own money to bet.
This is how the devil works, he pulls you in and when he knows you're deep in it, he strikes.
We get there and he plays the first game. To my surprise, he won, doubling the money. He went another round and won again. I started to believe him at this point. He walked up to me and handed me back the money I paid for the food. I should have left there but I used to make poor life choices.
He told me he could still double it again and because he had done it twice, I handed him the money back. That's when the devil pulled away.
I watched his smile turn upside down. This is how the conversation went.
Me: What happened?
Him: Give me a minute, I'm calculating something.
Me: calculating what? What happened to the money.
Him: I made one small mistake.
Me: okay, what does that mean?
Him: the money is gone but I won't make that mistake again.
I don't know what he meant by again because I was done.
So much for a confidence boost. I was about to leave when he said he didn't have any money with him to get him back home. The only money I had was my transport. He said we could double it and he'd have enough cash to go home. I agreed and gave him my transport, that one vanished too.
To make matters worse, I wasn't with my ATM card and my bank app was having issues so I was stranded.
After trying the bank app, I finally was able to transfer to a nearby POS. He followed me and told me he felt bad for losing my money. He said he wanted to make it up to me, his club's match was starting and he was sure we'd make all the money we lost back. All I just needed to do was give him the money with me and I needed to wait 90minutes for the match to end and we'll be back where we started.
He was very confident and still didn't have transport so I pitied him and gave him the money. He said the higher the stake the higher the reward.
I thought about watching the match as just an extension of my date. First half was almost ending and the other team was already leading Chelsea with 4 goals, he could not even look me in the eye when I asked what would happen to the bet we placed. I just carried myself peaceful and walked home. I reached my house after 30 minutes and went straight to my room to cuddle my pillow and count my losses.
After an hour, I heard my brother discussing with my dad about the match. I asked them for the score and they told me that match ended 6 - 4 with Chelsea winning the match.
I rushed to my room immediately to call him and ask for my money. My text weren't double ticking on WhatsApp so I called him instead, that's when I realized he blocked me.
I learnt a valuable lesson that day,
Never go out with a Chelsea fan.
This post is a submission to the Paritae blogging competition "Dating Chronicles". Be free to join and share your own experiences.
😂
You learnt your lesson
Anyways, you have a good heart still
A good heart that will soon turn violent 😂💔
Hahaha
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo
We won't allow that o
Who is the we abeg?😂
Myself and the class of gentlemen ni
You and those your class of gentlemen should shift 😂
We're shifting to where you are.....see you soon darling
So that's why you came back home tired the other day😂😂😂😂😂
🌚🌚
Very funny! I think after the first loss I'd've kicked him in the you know whats and left him stranded.
😂😂😂😂💔💔💔
I definitely know the you know what. But I was trying not to get violent so fast.
He is lucky I haven't seen him again because he will definitely get kicked in the you know what 😂
Ops, man down.. no wonder people say ladies have chicken brain, how would you pay his bills and still lend him money to bet game? It's obvious you were in love with him..
That guy is too smart, I believe next time you would never try to settle a stranger's bill who took you on a date..
Beautiful entry dear.. all the best
Play play you have called my brain chicken brain now o😂😂💔
I've learnt my lesson. I was trying to be an independent woman.
Omo never again 😂
Thanks for reading❤️
LoL.. it's not yours o, but if you check it well, you will see that I wasn't wrong sha😂😂😂🏃🏃🏃
Glad for that lesson o.. a soul is won finally
You almost made me love you...You now had to spoil it. Hope you are happy with yourself now that I've taken my love away😂
Noo na.. haii, please bring it back, I am single and ready to mingle🤣🤣🤣
You'll mingle with yourself.
Abi shey you want to mingle with someone with chicken brain?😂
LoL don't worry I will cope with the chicken brain.. in fact that's what often attracts me to Chickens😁😁...
Isn't this too harsh on us? Poor us! 🥲🤣 That was so loud though
So you decided to leave your bed and go sort a man's bills including yours, what a good girl in a harsh world! 😂
I get how it happened though, betting is not for the faint hearted lol
I'm sorry 🥺🥺... But I just had to.
Instead of me to stay in the one place that can never do me harm.
I've learnt my lesson sha.. Never again 😂
God😂😂😂...Will there be rest for Chelsea fans in this life
Can we find peace?😂😂
When y'all start winning, you will know peace.
The one time I needed you people to live up to expectations, you didn't 😂😂
Nice post
Thank you.
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Before reading this, I was heartbroken already but thank God the date ended in a baaaaad note and he blocked you sef😄.
It seems you don't like genuineness. My guy was genuine and not trying to fake the Normal ladies style😏
I was waiting for you to come. I thought you said you are only fine when I'm fine. Now that line is not showing face o😂
And please what's the emphasis on the bad?💔💔🌚😂
Your guy deserves a really big kick in the you know what and if you don't take time, you will join him.
No na, the line is real. The date scattered and didn't lead to anything... that should make us happy 😎
Me that's coming to borrow money from you sef. I'll come with genuineness and you won't be able to ignore
I pity you🥲...It will only end in tears 😂
Babe, don't you know his home address? Find him. Or should I escort you? Heeew, he duped you smoothly.
It's people like you that I like.
Please come and escort me o but you'll escort me to where I don't know sha😂
Don't worry..If I do ever see him again, I'll call you so you can come and beat him because me, it's only mouth I have😂😂😂
Trust my moral naa. But, wait oo, if really you want me to escort you to his place, first and foremost, give me my own plate of food and also let me know how the money should be shared. Asap
See this one... You never even do work you don dey find payment 😂😂
Oh hell no!
C’mon girl, TF with that conclusion?
That boy is wicked o😂😂😂😂😂
What is his name lemme send boys to go and beat him 😂😂
I'm sorry 😂💔🥺 but I just had to.
If it's any consolation, I am a partial Chelsea fan so technically I am concluded against myself too 😂
I feel attacked..truely sounded like something @nelson-george would want to draft out 😂😂..you went on a date and ended up being a money doubler..can you imagine? 😂
Guess it runs in the family then🌚🌚
Take your time o... Shebi you said you wanted me to find love😂
Rest please.. not my club🙄🙄🙄🙄
Jeez..that's a sad experience..
What kind of guy does this, hmmm, people dy oh
Sorry iyeh😂😂😂
The kind of guy that should be feared by all💔💔
Honestly oh... That's bad of Him
honestly, you should've just given him more money
You are not okay... I'll come and borrow money from you the next time🥲🥲
Lol, he at least tried and doubled it twice. The greed was allowing him try to double it again.