Last week I cancelled Pimp Your Post Thursday without explanation. It’s sometimes difficult to share, it was one of those times. Today, I’m in a bit better space and time for me to do some sharing.
From July 28 to August 10th is often a very difficult time of year for me. Those aren’t hard start and end dates, they are anniversaries. July 28th is the anniversary of the passing of my father and August 10th is the anniversary of the passing of my husband.
I actually thought I was doing a lot better with those anniversaries this year until news came on August 8th that my uncle had been admitted to palliative care. If you have been around me, you’ve likely heard me talk about my Uncle Ken, although I rarely called him ‘Uncle’, it was just Ken when we talked. We talked often over the years.
The news was unexpected for me. But, at some level when someone is 101 heading for 102, it’s kind of expected, but followed up quickly with “some day”. For Ken, ‘some day’ happened Tuesday evening. The three men who had had the strongest influence in my life have now all passed in a thirteen day window on different years.
Sometimes things come with synchronicity. I’ve been creating images based on a word every day and posting them. The following day’s word was “legacy”, how perfect. Ken had indeed left a legacy. I created this image:
Posted it with a quote I created:
As the final sands of time fall, the legacy of who we were as a person remains forever.
The DNA Helix on the left represented his life, the colour for what he brought to his life. The hourglass marks his passing. The poppies at the bottom pay tribute to his service in WW2. He indeed has left a legacy behind that will be reflected in everyone he shared time with.
Today was his funeral, I watched it on the livestream the funeral home provided. It lightened my heart to hear the sharing about Ken and his life. Most of all, the relaxed tone of the service and the laughter. It was a service that Ken would have appreciated.
Another synchronicity happened with the service that in some ways speaks to the influence these three men had on my life.
The service opened with the playing of “How Great Thou Art”, apparently dad and Ken shared a love for the same gospel piece. As brothers they likely heard it many times over the years.
The service ended with the playing of “Amazing Grace”, part of which was played on the bagpipes. It was my husband’s favourite song. For him it was literally an anthem for which he stood at attention for. His final wish, that I honoured, was to have a lone piper play it at his gravesite. Ken’s family would have been unaware of those connections when they made the plans.
The service itself included a family friend and three grandchildren sharing stories about Ken. Stories that included a lot of laughter. It also talked about Ken being wounded during WW2. A trauma that influenced much of what followed in his life. Not because of the wounds, but because of how his mindset around them and the rest of his life formed.
Here is a video that was recorded when Ken was 100, he tells his own story:
Not long after Ken passed, my cousin Lynda put a Facebook post up in which she talked about how her dad ended every conversation with “Keep smiling, they will wonder what you’re doing”.
The moment I read it, I remembered the many conversations I had with him over the last few years and yes, he ended everyone of them the same way. You couldn’t help but hang up the phone smiling. He brought love and laughter into any event I was with him at.
In November of 2021 he celebrated his 100th birthday. I created this image as a virtual greeting for him as we were still dealing with COVID:
What I expressed on there was as true at the end as it was then. He never did call himself ‘old’, he called himself a ‘senior senior’. It wasn’t pridefulness, it was part of his mindset to not allow himself to think he was old, that he still had life in him and could contribute. And he did.
I wrote a lengthy post to mark his 100th birthday. I’ll link to it here and let you know, the ageless mindset I talked about in that post, it remained a constant until the day he passed.
He wrote a book after he turned 100. When the neighbour spoke at the service he called the title the best book title ever, I agree with him. He called the book, “My First 100 Years”. I have a copy here, delivered by my cousin Susan. I’ll cherish even more being able to look through the book.
I’ll cherish the memories of the conversations we had, often more than an hour at a time. We talked about a wide range of subjects but we always spent some of the time talking about the Royal Canadian Legion, something we both shared membership of. Him, a Veteran and Life member. Me, an Associate and Life member.
Life membership is awarded for service to the branch and the community. Ken also had the Meritorious Service Medal, it’s awarded for service that continued after receiving Life Membership.
As hard as this period has been, it’s maybe fitting that the three of them; Dad, Ken and Frank will all be remembered at the same time each year. I always add a special remembrance for Dad and Frank at Remembrance time. Ken will be part of that this year.
All three of them were war veterans. Dad and Ken from WW2 and Frank from Korea. All three of them brought similar and different influences into my life. All three of them have my love forever.
RIP Don, Ken and Frank — Lest We Forget
Shadowspub writes on a variety of subjects as she pursues her passion for learning. She also writes on other platforms and enjoys creating books you use like journals, notebooks, coloring books etc. Her Nicheless Narrative podcast airs on Thursdays each week.
NOTE: unless otherwise stated, all images are the author’s.
Some of the image work may have been done in Midjourney for which I hold a licence to use the imges commercially.
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I'm very sry for your loss @shadowspub , as I often say in this occasions: you now have more angels taking care of you till the momment you all meet again.
I have some out there waiting for me, protecting and guiding me through this vast and hostile ocean which is life in this world.
Sending a big hugh to you.
No truer words @drakernoise .. he's passed but not really gone. He's left my ability to talk to, to give a hug to or break bread with.
What a poignant reflection on the impact your father, husband and uncle had on you. My sincere condolence to you and your family.
Your uncle Ken left a lasting legacy—resilience and a positive attitude to keep on living. Cherish your memories of these three men and remember, keep smiling.💜
Thank you @kemmyb, all three of them left a legacy in their own way. Ken's showed up stronger when I look at the adversity he overcame
My sister passed away in 2008 and I still think about her. She was my rock.
We never forget or stop missing them.
@shadowspub...
I've known you since the day's of our legacy chain. In this time, the one thing I have learned about you. Is your passion for writing, preservation of history and memories, and of course... Community. But delving in deeper... I have found something much more important than all of these things... a friend. So from one friend, to another. Please accept my condolences. I send you, and your family. Comfort, love, and positive energy. So yes... keep smiling, and lest we forget. In honor of three souls. That made such a positive impact in your life... and one... that brought you into our lives...
Love and light, dear friend...
@tipu curate
Thank you @wesphilbin from what I've learned of you over the years, I have no doubt you and Ken would have understood each other at a soul level.
@shadowspub...
It got me in the feels there... thank you. Soul level... yes...
Upvoted 👌 (Mana: 45/75) Liquid rewards.
My sincere condolence on the passing away of your uncle and may your dad and husband continue to rest on in peace.
thank you @fredaa, your kindness is appreciated.
You're welcome ma'am
Death is something we are always not prepared for.
when it happens, the pain and tears are always there and can be devastating but as time goes on, we are going to find the memories to keep us going and from those memories, we would remain strong and keep on kicking
Your uncle was a great man and i am sure he is proud of you and your achievement
Love from #dreemport
how very true @fashtioluwa even when a death is expected there is still a disbelief when it happens. I knew for months before my husband passed he was terminal and watched his final hours. It still felt like a shock when he breathed his last.
Yeah
I can relate
I was with my big uncle in the hospital when the doctor told us it wouldn’t be possible. When he passed away it was like it wasn’t meant to happen because we spoke the previous night.
Let’s listen to memories by maroon5
No one is ever prepared for the death of a loved one, no matter how old they get or how "senior senior". I am so sorry for your loss.
Your uncle's legacy will forever live on and all the memories of all three of them will always be with you. "Keep smiling, they will wonder what you're doing".
Love from @dreemport .
very true and thank you @rucckie. I have often used my Uncle's advice over the years and yes, it does keep some wondering what you're up to.
I am so sorry for your loss ma'am, last week I wondered why there wasn't PYPT until today when I read this, I think the break was well deserved, you needed time to process everything And get back up better, though I know it will be so hard for you to get back as nothing happened, just as your cousin said "keep smiling", it will be alright. Thankful Uncle Ken left a legacy and that legacy lives on.
I popped in from #dreemport
#dreemerforlife.
thank you @amiegeoffrey ... I don't know that we get back to like nothing happened but we do get back to a new normal. Took me a long time to stop thinking I should give dad a call to discuss something after he passed. It fades with time.
It sure does fade away with time. Love and Light.🥰
This post was so beautifully written, serving as a most wonderful tribute to your Uncle Ken, whilst also fondly remembering your dad and husband. If I ever reach 100, I'd like to look and sound as well as your Uncle Ken did in the interesting video - remarkable. I truly pray for peace in the hearts of you and your family. Thanks for sharing something so deeply personal.
Speaking now for myself.. it serves as a reminder to cherish the short time we have together on earth with those we love the most, and in faith pray that one day we may all together rest in peace. 'Keep smiling'.
thank you @ma3str0 .. I have to agree with you on the getting to 100 part, to be able to be so aware and active is truly a gift of a life well lived. My grandmother (Ken and dad's mother) also lived to 101 and was aware right up until a few days before she passed. Ken lived longer than her but they were both well aware of life.
I am very sorry for your loss. My prayers of comfort goes to you and your family. Uncle Ken is a legend to me. How you spoke about him made me see him that way. It's touching to see how he has left behind a legacy that will continue to shape the lives of those who had the privilege of knowing him. Like he always says, "Keep smiling". His memories will continue to live on. Continue to hold onto all the fond memories of these three remarkable men who have played a significant role in shaping you. Much love to you ma'am.
Thank you @esther-emmanuel, I had forgotten about the conversations you and I had about him. I remember them now. He has indeed left a legacy and an example of just how powerful reaching a positive mindset can be.
My sincere condolences, definitely a legend in his own right
#dreemer
yes @sam9999 he certainly was. thank you for stopping by.
Oh how I will miss him!!!
and it doesn't matter that I never met him face to face - because hearing you talk about him made me feel like I was a part of his story, and he - a part of mine!!!
Even thought that time will be a difficult one for you... I almost feel that his passing during that time really almost makes it.. hmmm reverent?? you know what I mean?
almost like all the love is just concentrated right there - right where it should be - to make that time more of a celebration of love??? i'm not sure if i'm saying it right - but I hope you know what I mean.
He just added a bit more glow to those days. hehe
first 100 years indeed. LOL.
well Ken- you've already started your journey on the next 100. and i'll meet you there before you complete this century!!!
Much love to you Shadows. Youve been blessed with three special men, that's for sure :)
I think I know what you're saying @dreemsteem, it was what I said at the end of the post. You were expanding it some. I know, ms brevity meet ms wordybutworthit :)
Thank you my friend.
yes you did - i re-read what i said and what you said - and you absolutely said that LOLOL
We appreciate you taking the time, to either use #ThoughtfulDailyPost, or otherwise help this Community grow. So...
Thank you!!
Always have this picture in mind, those special souls in our lives planted seeds in our hearts. Seeds that become strong plants, helping us finding and going our way.
One day when the soul passes away, there still remain those wonderful plants and flowers in the hearts of those left behind.
Uncle Ken's plant now smiles through you
May he Rest in Peace 🙏
That video is a must-watch. Thank you for sharing that!! I would be shocked if your Uncle had not seen my Aunt in Hospital. I know she was there at the same time.
I am also happy to hear they had something set up so you could be at the funeral too. They did that for my Father in Law so his brother could attend and it was special.
Much love Shadows.